How To Be Kind (It's As Rewarding As Sex And Chocolate, Say Scientists)

The Huffington Post UK   First Posted: 15/11/2011 10:22 Updated: 15/11/2011 10:22

Being kind to others is as rewarding as eating chocolate and having sex, according to scientists.

A recent study by the University of California, found that performing a selfless act of kindness triggers the release of the same feelgood chemical in the brain, dopamine, as when we give ourselves a treat.

"The ventral striatum is typically active in response to simple rewards, such as chocolate, sex and money," says researcher Naomi Eisenberger.

"It now seems likely that some of the health benefits of social support actually come from the support we provide to others."

But with all the daily pressures of work, relationships, finances and health worries, living a kind-hearted existence can be challenging.

Michael J Chase, author of Am I Being Kind, believes in the Dailai Lama philosophy that, "world peace must develop out of inner peace" and says that being compassionate isn't as hard as you think as you just need to identify the 'keys' to kindness.

Being Aware - become mindful of your thoughts, words and actions
Asking - ask yourself each day 'Am I Being Kind?'
Performing - perform spontaneous acts of kindness

To encompass the simple acts of kindness, you need to turn your 'to-do' attitude into 'to-be' by adopting the following kindness principles:

Kindness towards yourself
Self-kindness means nourishing your life with healthy food, exercise, laughter, a career you love and personal and spiritual growth. It also means making room in your schedule for activities that inspire you, spending some time alone in silence, and always choosing kind thoughts about yourself

Kindness towards others
You'll encounter dozens of opportunities each day to be kind to others. Practice kindness toward your family, friends, co-workers, and even strangers. Speak kind words about people, be a good listener, smile often and give sincere apologies.

Kindness towards the earth
Make time each day to be kind to the earth. This practice starts with simple things that you may already be doing. Ride your bike or walk rather than drive, recycle, pick up the trash, purchase environmentally friendly products and be compassionate towards animals and all living things.

After you've nailed the key principles of kindness, take a look at the nine elements to a kind heart, by author Michael J Chase.

Attentiveness
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"To be attentive and notice when someone could use a helping hand or kind word takes us back to the first key to kindness: being aware. If we are to make a difference in the lives of others, we must become conscious and open our spiritual eyes. Having an attentive heart can be as simple as noticing a pedestrian trying to cross the street or seeing a neighbor struggling with groceries. Using our radar and continually scanning for those who require our assistance gives us countless opportunities to be kind.

"However, with so much need in the world, it's necessary to create boundaries and know our limits - it's unrealistic to think that we can help every single person on our path. But if we can heighten our instinctive heart-sense a little more each day, not only will we become more aware of what we can do for others, we'll also experience one of life's greatest gifts: the joy of service.

"Take a few moments today and intentionally look for occasions to be kind. You can do so at work, in traffic, or when you're walking down the street. As the Dalai Lama once said, 'Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.' The chances are endless."

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04:35 AM on 07/09/2012
The content of this article was pretty good, and the intent was no doubt superb. However, the photos led me to wonder... are only pretty, young women in fashionably casual attire expected to be kind? Are men exempt from the need to be kind? Will my compassion and empathy be less acceptable if I'm 50 and a bit rough around the edges?
06:56 PM on 02/19/2012
I am a nice person to know, but I think people are too much sometimes. I dont agree totally with the report.
Job/career. Everyone wants promotion, whats wrong with doing a good job and being happy.
Exercise. Look good and try to keep as young as you can, do whatever you like to keep fit.
Love. Do something stupid, take it easy, and dont lean too much on the other person.
Money You could die at any age, save a bit, spend a bit, enjoy it.
I just think the world is too driven into what we should be then what we are.
Life is a stage we are all actress/actors said shakespear.
Oscar Wilde went and added to that, we are sometimes bad at casting.
Be what U are, do what you want to do.
photo
Deborah Marshall
Taking life with the good and the bad and sometime
01:36 AM on 12/02/2011
I agree what I get from being good is more rewarding then anything else I love being nice it beats being mean any day, besides being mean gives me a headache so I avoid that kind of situation at all times don't like the way I feel when I get angry!