'Come Dine With Me's Dave Lamb: 'My Voice Is So Camp And Over The Top'
You might not recognise the face but you'll certainly know the voice from his hilarious quips on Come Dine With Me. We caught up with the show's star, Dave Lamb, to find out what he's like in the kitchen, who he'd invite to his fantasy dinner party and he lets us in on a few CDWM secrets too...
What has been your favourite ever Come Dine With Me moment?
Well there have been quite a few but the one that I've thought of quite a lot lately is the episode when the snake pooed on the table. This woman brought in the snake and wondered if any of her guests would notice it when it was wrapped around her neck like a scarf. She then put it on the table while they were eating their food and it did the most enormous shit. It was utterly horrific and basically ended the meal. After the snake did it she said, 'oh he did that about a week ago, I didn't think he'd do it again!'
You're famous for your quips, do you write your own script?
Basically they go away and film it for five days and cut down 75 hours of film into five half hour programmes so they have to write the script, but I'm allowed to improvise round it if something occurs to me.
Do you have a favourite celebrity chef from Celebrity Come Dine With Me?
We just did a show where the people who had already been on but were rubbish were invited back to have another go. So Bobby Davro, Leslie Joseph and Wayne Sleep were among the returnees and there are some cracking moments on that.
If you were throwing your own fantasy Come Dine With Me dinner party, who would you invite?
I'd invite Henry the Eighth as he'd eat anything that was put in front of him. Stephen Fry would have to be there and Christopher Biggins could provide the anecdotes. Then you'd some control so maybe Wayne Rooney to clash with the others. That would do nicely I think.
What would be on your menu if you were a contestant on the show?
Well I'm absolutely hopeless in the kitchen, a completely useless cook. My signature dish used to be Beef Stroganoff so I'd probably revive that, although last time I cooked that it got slated by my then girlfriend who is now my wife. Despite it being one of our first dates she just pushed it away and refused to eat any more of it. She's actually a fantastic cook and has a chef's qualification.
Do you think there's a winning formula to win the cash prize on the show?
I think the key thing is to pay attention to the guests. A lot of people go on there and they're very self-conscious and are busy thinking about what they want to get out of the show. But it's the ones that actually watch and are sensitive to their guest's requirements who do the best.
What has been the most shocking thing you've seen on the show that could never be broadcast?
There's a remarkable amount. There's nudity, bad language, vomiting, celebrities in a state of undress, compromised positions and there's some very, very bad manners.
What do you like to watch on the box?
I don't watch as much as I used to because I'm busy three days a week with Come Dine With Me, which is a lot of television to be watching. I tend to watch drama or comedy. I love Spy on Sky 1 at the moment, which I think is fantastic. I watch Downton Abbey too. I haven't been watching the X Factor but I did last year - I enjoyed Matt Cardle's performances.
Do people recognise you when they hear you speak?
No, they tend not to because it's such a shouty performance and it's so camp and over the top. I don't tend to get recognised for my voice or my face so it's quite good really as I can go about my business and nobody notices me. Although when I've had a few drinks I can get quite shouty and the voice comes out!