Because that's a genuine possibility, ladies and gentleman, thanks to the recent announcement that the UK will host the world's first 'Watching Paint Dry' Championships.
The people behind the stunt - sorry, serious endurance competition - are LocalTraders.com, who were inspired by the age-old expression, "I'd rather watch paint dry." Now the question is... would you? Not even for an iPad?
"You don’t need to be physically fit or participate in a vigorous training regime, what’s more important is mental strength, concentration and endurance," said a LocalTraders.com spokesman.
"After so many sporting disappointments we’re keen to invent a sport which England can excel at and watching paint dry could be just the thing. Let’s be honest, with England’s recent performances on the football and rugby pitches most of us would prefer to watch paint dry anyway."
Pretty brutal, you guys, but no-one can really argue with you there.
Want to enter? Here are the details, from LocalTraders.com's competition entry page:
"Hopefuls must send in a picture of themselves watching paint dry and state the longest time they’ve managed to stare at a wall of drying paint without looking away. We also want to know your favourite paint colour and why."
One suggestion for you... "Falu red". It's a top colour, that. From Sweden. You'll like it.
Photo courtesy of Flickr user "The Big Quack"