I ran into the "but that's not the way they do it in class" argument as well when I was working with my kids on multi-digit multiplication. I replied that they could do it that way but they would learn it "my way" as well. Some time later I showed my daughter how you could multiply and divide polynomials and complex numbers using "my way" (read traditional way). She has come to appreciate that there is a method behind my madness and that it is worth going along with it. My son will learn those issues soon enough.

I handle the math, science, and history homework issues. My wife (who is a linguist from Ukraine) typically handles the English issues.

Making sure that they have not only done the homework but mastered the content the homework covers can take considerable time and frustration. But I make sure they understand what is going on, not just have something to take in. I also provide guidance as to what is an acceptable level of an answer - holding my son to a higher standard than he claims other students work to.

It is very clear that homework disrupts family life even though the research supporting it is non-convincing and few schools of education actually teach homework-giving as a professional technique. It is my view that the core problem lies in the way in which homework supplants the authority of the parents. Teachers should be fully in charge of their classrooms. Parents should be fully in charge of their homes. Parent-child conflict is actually a byproduct of parental impotence over the homework task. All parents deal with their children's behaviors. If I instruct my child to take out the garbage and he does not do it to my satisfaction, I, as a parent, have a range of options including punishing him, modifying the assignment, taking the trash out together, or letting the requirement go. Whatever I choose to do, I can manage conflict using my own judgment and decision-making. Homework is a rare situation in which parents are given high levels of responsibility with very little authority. If teachers gave homework with the understanding that it was only with the permission of the parents, they would find that, as a whole, parents would support what they were doing, yet, push come to shove, they would modify or waive the requirement rather than engage in unproductive battles. Kenneth Goldberg, Ph.D. Author of The Homework Trap. www.thehomeworktrap.com.

Isn`t it a parents responsibility to help their children with their homework if they are struggling , or is it a " not my job " attitude ? Just because we did it different when we went to school is no excuse. It is up to the parents to " learn the different way " things are done now. I did and both my kids got through School, College and University with no problems and are both doing very well indeed.