Ah, if there's one thing guaranteed to raise our hackles at the start of a busy week, it's a nice, juicy 'health and safety gone mad' story. And, as luck would have it, we've just stumbled across one. Marvellous!
The details? NHS Trust officials in Manchester have banned staff from using metal paper fasteners after several team members cut their fingers on them. They're not quite the sort in the picture above - so a hat-tip to our source, the Manchester Evening News, for finding exactly the hazardous type in question.
A deadly serious memo outlined this new ruling and the thinking behind it:
"Due to recent incidents, NHS Manchester has decided to immediately withdraw the use of metal paper fasteners.
"Please ensure any that remain in use be replaced by similar plastic fasteners. The use of metal fasteners is prohibited and must be carefully disposed of immediately. Thank you for your cooperation."
Mind you, for all our tutting and sniggering, we must admit we've sometimes been on the receiving end when stationery fights back.
Sharpened pencils are the worst culprits. And ring-binders can be quite lethal if they unexpectedly slam shut. And don't get us started on rubber bands...