Remember that refreshing moment when He's Just Not That Into You hit the dating scene?
Humour reentered the dating scene, washing away The Rules with a huge dose of reality detergent.
The latest tell-it-like-it-is dating manual, Why You’re Not Married... Yet, is another triumph of common sense over wishful thinking. C'mon, it's called 'fairytale' romance for a reason.
According to US television writer Tracy McMillan, ladies get the relationship their deserve. And she's writing from bitter experience.
"The conventional thinking in this area, is that you're single because you're too too fabulous or too wonderful. Men are simply not good enough. And I was like 'Nooo, it wasn't because I was too fab, it’s because I wasn’t very...'"
"When I started writing down my observations, I never expected them to be published. They were about my own experiences. It certainly wasn't some treatise for women," said McMillan, who's written for Mad Men, Life on Mars and will be turning her book into a new television comedy series.
Are these the reasons you're still single?
You are a Bitch
Anger and Fear Are Keeping You Single
You are Shallow
You're Only Interested In Getting What 'You' Want
You are a Slut
Casual Sex Probably Won’t Get You Married
You are Selfish
Marriage Is About Giving Something, Not Getting It
You are Crazy
Deal with Your Inner Courtney Love
You are a Mess
You Need to Get Your Shit Together
You Hate Yourself
You Can Only Love a Man as Much as You Love Yourself
You are A Liar
Deluding Yourself, and Other Tragedies, Make You Unloveable
You are Acting Like a Guy
Get into Your Feminine and Realise You Are a Prize
You are Godless
Basically, If You Could Change on Your Own, You Already Would Have So, while it doesn’t have to be a bearded guy in the sky and a big church with a painted ceiling—it needs to be something, anything, that isn’t your mind or the stuff it’s telling you. A place beyond reason and pure intellect. Because, ultimately marriage is a spiritual trip.
McMillan admits that it's not necessarily advice that will work for everyone -- it's simply based on what she's learned.
"We’re all working to a Sex And The City and Bridget Jones model, which view the search of love as a 'hunt'. The focus is on finding 'him' and I don't think that approach is working," McMillan told Huffpost UK Lifestyle.
"You've got to think about what you’re going to give, instead of what you’re going to get. That will shift the way you think about everything and your actions will then change."
"Loving another person is an opportunity to love another human being. That will change how you think about yourself and others."
McMillan points out that modern women put their careers and homes life, quite literally, first: "We move to the city and get a career. Then it’s done and we look for relationships. There’s challenges in that."
Why You’re Not Married... Yet by Tracy is published by Hardie Grant Books as a paperback and ebook.