Birmingham has as many canals as Venice, we are told. It now also has as many Tories as a West Sussex market town.
Join us for occasional tit-bits from the Conservative Party conference in England's second city. What new word with Boris come up with to insult the prime minister? Where is Andrew Mitchell hiding? And will David Cameron have to give a two-hour long speech without notes while drinking a glass of water upside down to have any hope of outdoing Ed Miliband.