A senior employee at the Vatican has resigned following revelations that he had been outsourcing his job to a worker in China in order to spend more time on Twitter and Reddit.
The Vatican first became suspicious of Pope Benedict XVI's behaviour when its main server showed a series of regular logins from China under the name of 'Benny'.
Senior members of staff then studied the Pope's computer history - and found that an average day for His Holiness looked like this:
9am – Arrive and surf Twitter; join in with hashtag games
10am – Look for funnies on Reddit
11am – Watch cat videos
1pm – Lunch. Browse Ebay; comment on friends' Facebook statuses
2pm – Update LinkedIn profile; watch more cat videos
3pm – Go on Twitter again
4.30pm – End-of-day update email to Vatican management
5pm – Log off
"We were suspicious by just how much he tweeted," said a Vatican source, "but we had no idea he was up to all this."
The Pope is now on garden of Eden leave.