BREAKING NEWS KLAXON! It seems the busiest boy band in the world, One Direction, need some help organising their lives. So, guess what? They're getting their own personal assistants. How do we apply?
While Niall, Liam and Zayn all share an assistant between them. Harry Styles and Louis (eh?) will each have a dedicated PA to themselves.
A source allegedly told The Mirror: "The guys have incredibly manic professional and personal lives, and they started getting stressed out about their ever-increasing workload.
"Obviously the record label don't want them burning out, so they came up with the idea of letting them appoint personal assistants."
Their PA's will join 1D's already bustling team of managers, publicists, financial advisers, stylists, asset managers, around-the-clock security and drivers.
So, what will these new personal assistants be getting up to on a day-to-day basis? We've got a few ideas...
Personal Assistants required
Our client, an international boy band, is seeking three hard-working, dedicated and enthusiastic individuals to provide practical and productive support to individual band members. It is essential that candidates are proficient in Excel, have a pleasant telephone manner and previous experience fighting off manic teenage fans.
Responsibilities will include liaising with bouncers to ensure the band have access to top nightclubs without having to queue like ordinary people, booking teeth whitening appointments, stock piling hairspray/gel, disposing of fan underwear in a safe and sanitary manner as well as reading bedtime stories and tucking the clients in at night.
Benefits include, international travel, rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous, being envied by every girl on the planet and getting to spend every waking hour with Harry Styles.
Please send a covering letter and CV to firstname.lastname@example.org
Only successful candidates will be contacted