PARENTS

Looking Past The Martyr Mum Title

17/07/2013 19:01 | Updated 22 May 2015

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Last year of my 20s! A great day to reminisce and appreciate what I have in life. I've spent the day at a theme park and had a fantastic time... If you'd have told me 10 years ago I'd have entered a theme park and not even stepped on one thrill ride but still had an amazing day, I'd have laughed in your face.

Yes, that's right, me the adrenaline junkie had a fantastic time on the teacups!

The highlight of our day was watching the sea lions and parrots and seeing my son's face light up. I realised that life's not about me anymore; his happiness leads to mine and if I can make him laugh just once, it makes my day!

I read a piece online the other day on Martyr mums. It was based on an article written by Daisy Waugh in The Times. It makes you wonder why working mums and stay at home mums can't just agree to disagree. Martyr - one who makes great sacrifices or suffers much in order to further a belief, cause, or principle. So by that definition, I have given up my life for my son and I am suffering?!

I love being at home with my son. My day evolves around him and his mood reflects my mood. Some women may think that it's sad that my life lacks purpose, but who are they to judge me? I am happy, and isn't that what life should be about?

Would I work during the day if I had to? Would I put him in childcare? Well yes, I would have no choice. I know I'm blessed to be able to choose my hours and to have a very hard working husband who has made our lifestyle possible.

On the other hand, how can I blame others who want or have to work? Who am I to tell them how to live their lives. If you need or want to work, then surely a happy mummy leads to a happy family. What good would it do staying at home with the kids because you feel duty bound to be there and being miserable as sin, who's that helping? Surely in this day and age we can understand that women have the choice to work and as a generation, we are having to work more to sustain a decent lifestyle.

Cant we have a nice mix of stay at home mummies and career mums without feeling the need to downgrade each others parenting styles.

Do our insecurities effect our judgement of others? I worry my son will think I lack ambition, hence the blog, and I'm sure working mums worry about leaving their kids.

Lets face it, motherhood is one huge worry, however you're tackling it. So let's try and concentrate on our own family, whichever way it works best for us.

We spend our days teaching our kids to be honest and non judgemental, so why aren't we listening to our own lessons?

Tracey is mum to lil dude, an extreme dino fan. She blogs about their lives, living, laughing and learning as they go!

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