Some questions posed by pop songs are crying out for answers. The Three Degrees almost certainly wanted to know when they were going to see that fella again, for example.
But others? Not so much. From Tina to Travis, here are 12 questions posed by pop songs that aren't crying out for answers. But we've answered them anyway.
What becomes of the broken-hearted?
Posed by: The Contours.
Meaning: You broke my heart AND IT FEELS BLOODY AWFUL. WHAT WILL BECOME OF ME?! DOOMED, WE'RE ALL DOOMED.
Answer: They get over it at some point. Trust us, you'll be fine.
How can we be lovers if we can’t be friends?
Posed by: Michael Bolton.
Meaning: We’re a couple but we don’t actually get along: we're always fighting and you keep using my hair curlers.
Answer: You can, as long as you don’t mind the sex always being make-up sex.
Where is the love?
Posed by: Roberta Flack and Donny Hathaway.
Meaning: Why on earth am I wasting my time with someone who’s attached and hasn’t left their partner like they said they would? What was I thinking?!
Answer: Anywhere but inside the person you love right now. Have you tried looking down the back of the sofa?
How do I live without you?
Posed by: LeAnn Rimes.
Meaning: It’s over, you’re gone and I might as well die.
Answer: By taking it one day at a time, spending time with good friends and getting hammered.
What’s love got to do with it?
Posed by: Tina Turner.
Meaning: I don’t love you. NO, REALLY, HONESTLY, I DON’T. WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M PROTESTING TOO MUCH.
Answer: Everything. Sorry, Tina.
How can you mend a broken heart?
Posed by: Al Green.
Meaning: See 1.
Answer: With time, the love of family and friends, and therapy.
Wouldn’t it be nice?
Posed by: The Beach Boys.
Meaning: I can’t stop daydreaming about our future together. I love you. In fact, God only knows what I’d be without you.
Answer: Yes, it would. Now stop sitting around writing songs, get off your backside and make it happen.
How can I love you more?
Posed by: M People.
Meaning: I love you. I mean it: I really love you. I REALLY, REALLY LOVE YOU.
Answer: By having you whisk me off on a nice holiday.
Who do you think you are?
Posed by: Spice Girls.
Meaning: Prove to me who you are. Or rather: how good you are at things. Specifically: swinging, making and moving things.
Answer: Anyone but a member of the Spice Girls.
Where do broken hearts go?
Posed by: Whitney Houston.
Meaning: See 1 and 6.
Answer: The broken heart factory, where they get mended and then reinserted in your sleep about 18 months later.
Who’s zoomin’ who?
Posed by: Aretha Franklin
Meaning: You thought you were pursuing me. But guess what? I was pursuing you!
Answer: Not sure. It’s a bit chicken-and-egg.
Why does it always rain on me?
Posed by: Travis.
Meaning: My life is rubbish, I feel hopeless, OH WOE IS ME etc etc.
Answer: Because you’re the lead singer of Travis.