So it's January, you're back at work, and the rest of your miserable year at the office is stretching out ahead of you like a grey, dusty road to hell.
Congratulations! You're part of the modern industrial-office complex. Just wait it out for another 50 years and you can retire.
Meanwhile you're going to need something to kill the time while you stare blankly at the box on your desk that presumably is some kind of computer or something.
Which is what the Conference Call Simulator is for. This odd but hypnotic online project is the work of a man named Zach Scott, and combines mournful music with snippets of the conference call from hell, wrapped up into an endless, awful, randomised mulch.
Listen to it for five minutes and you might just gain the impetus to quit your job and go work in the fields or something, with, I don't know, rabbits and owls?
The Morning Email helps you start your workday with everything you need to know: breaking news, entertainment and a dash of fun. Learn more