Do you need help choosing which party to vote for? Well, Bill Bailey is here to help, having summed up the state of British politics perfectly.
Speaking eruditely at a work-in-progress show, Bill Bailey Unplugged, the British comedian discussed his views on the major three parties, along with Ukip.
Predicting the results of the general election in 2015, The Times newspaper quoted Bailey as saying the only trace of the Liberal Democrats will be "a bunch of flowers taped to some railings."
David Cameron, on the other hand, was poetically described as a "congealed, laminated weasel."
Ukip, he argued, are a troupe of "sozzled berks" whose only policies include an electrified fence at Dover and "no women in the bar area."
Ed Miliband was rather tragically described as being "like a plastic bag caught in a tree."
"No one knows how he got up there and no one can be bothered to get him down."
Bailey, who appeared in one of Labour’s 2010 general election broadcasts, has already admitted he has grown frustrated with the Labour Party.
"I find them increasingly frustrating because there seems to be a lack of direction,” he said in January.
“I’ve always been a Labour supporter, but ordinary working people are not being represented in the way that they used to.”
“People look at all the parties and see similarities,” he concluded.
Cameron, meanwhile, will urge voters to shun Ukip "extremists" in the European elections Thursday, as he tries to draw a line under the Maria Miller furore today.
Launching the Tories' campaign for next month's poll, the Prime Minister is to argue that his is the only party focused on Britain's national interest rather than political dogma.
