COMEDY

Eleven Dogs We'd Pick For The England Team

03/06/2014 15:00 BST | Updated 03/06/2014 15:59 BST
KIVILCIM PINAR via Getty Images

Ah, the England football team. Twenty-three of the country's best players (according to Roy Hodgson) have just made their way to Brazil to represent their country on the World Cup pitch. Don't they look lovely in their press shots, too? Those shirts carefully designed to subtly recall the strip worn back in 1966, when we actually won and picked up that rather over-the-top trophy for the country's collective mantlepiece.

Obviously, it's at this time that we indulge in our favourite pre-World Cup pastime: reliving prior England blunders, discussing precisely how agonised we are by the very idea of penalty shootouts and pondering exactly how the national squad are going to throw victory away. All while nursing a tiny flicker of World Cup optimism. Even the Home Office isn't immune to this kind of thing.

But while everyone else is living out the entirety of Baddiel and Skinner's Three Lions we've decided to go in a different direction. Dog videos. What better antidote to endless "I remember where I was when Gareth Southgate stepped up to the penalty spot" anecdotes than lovely dogs playing lovely football? There isn't one. Trust us.

So without further ado, here are our picks for the England dog squad (managed by Roy Dogson, of course): 11 mutts who are very good at keeping their eyes and paws firmly on the ball:

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