Clearly the producers of Made in Chelsea don't rate the intelligence of us viewers too highly. This is the only possible explanation for why these evil masterminds decided those watching the series finale needed to be reminded it's currently the festive season LITERALLY (and I mean this in the literal sense) every three seconds. I love this time of year but even I was starting to get a serious case of the Ebenezers after 3,457 uses of the word "Christmas" during last night's episode.
At least a jolly time was being had by most of the Made in Chelsea crew. There was plenty of kissing and making up with Louise and Andy, Phoebe and Fran, and Lucy and Spencer all putting their troubles of the last 10 weeks behind them.
There was also a positive outcome for Young Simon Cowell (aka Alex) and Binky who started snogging at the banquet table after Alex agreed to go to the Felsteads' for Boxing Day. He might have been happy but it was hard to tell. This bloke is so unenthusiastic and slow it's like he's been given a heavy sedative and shoved in front of the camera against his will. Hopefully during the series break he'll be able to make a break for freedom.
Of course, it would not be an MiC season ender if it was all sweetness and light, and this time the bitchiness was provided by Victoria.
At the ice rink The Double Spice Girl (see this column) told her archenemy Cheska: "You have ear muffs on, you look like you're working in a radio control tower". Following up this personal jibe, Victoria added, "Do you girls have to take everything so personally? It's like a joke".
Yes, it was like a joke, except it wasn't all that funny (and as the King of Unfunny Gags, I should know). As posh morons go, Victoria is obviously not the brightest, but what she lacks in brains she makes up for with persistence. At the banquet, she kept on at Cheska, this time coming up with a seasonal insult, calling her "a fat turkey", which seems like an appropriately tawdry note to sign off with.
Goodbye to Made in Chelsea and thanks to all those cast members and producers who have helped make it even less than the sum of it parts during the course of this series. Happy Christmas and I'll see you in a few months. I will miss you, but not a lot.
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