PARENTS

Amanda Holden: I'm Never Having Another Baby, After Trauma Of Miscarriage And Stillbirth

28/08/2014 10:58 | Updated 20 May 2015

Amanda Holden I'm never having another baby after trauma of miscarriage and stillbirth

Amanda Holden has decided not to try for another child after experiencing a miscarriage and a stillbirth.

"I can't put my family through that again," she said.

The Britain's Got Talent judge, 43, and her husband Chis Hughes have two daughters, Alexa (Lexi), eight, and Hollie, two.

Following Hollie's birth Amanda spent three days in intensive care and says she 'came close to death' after suffering a huge loss of blood.

Before Hollie was born, Amanda had a miscarriage in 2010 and a stillborn son in 2011.

"If I could, I would have more kids, but I can't put my family through that again," Amanda told Essentials magazine. "Chris and I were talking about this the other day, saying how if we'd met earlier we'd have had more kids, but that you end up with the ones you're meant to have.

"We're incredibly lucky to have our girls."

Speaking about the birth of her stillborn son, Amanda said: "From somewhere in the hospital I could hear the most horrendous screams.

"I presumed it was from the labour ward until I realised I could hear my daughter's name, "Lexi, Lexi, Lexi!" being shouted out animalistically.

"It was me wailing and making the most horrific guttural noises. Everything came tumbling down."

Rather than thinking about expanding her family, Amanda said her focus now lies on balancing her career and her family life - something she hasn't always been able to do.

"Acting is pretty gruelling," she says. "You're away for weeks, sometimes months, on end... it's hard to balance with kids.

"BGT gave me the financial freedom not to have to worry about working all the time – and I could do it around my kids."

From September, Amanda will also be covering Holly Willoughby's maternity leave on This Morning. She said the breakfast show schedule fits in perfectly with her family routine.

"I'll be back to pick Lexi up from school, and Hollie's at nursery a few days a week."

With her busy work schedule and looking after her daughters, Amanda joked that her husband feels like he is at the bottom of her list of priorities.

"He says he's last on the family list after the hamster," she said. "It's not true. I love that man. I couldn't do any of this without him because he's my core.

"We try for date nights, we really do, but usually we're so tired we end up lying in front of a box set in our PJs. Actually, that's pretty much my idea of bliss."

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