Fifty Shades Of Gran Is The Most Hilarious/Disturbing Thing You'll See On Twitter Today

She slowly licked her lips, slowly undid the buttons of her blouse and slowly lay back on the bed. She did everything slowly, she was 86.

— Fifty Shades of Gran (@50ShadesGran) January 22, 2015

'Rip my clothes off, tie me up and spank me till Tuesday!' she screamed. Which is just one reason why she's banned from the post office.

— Fifty Shades of Gran (@50ShadesGran) January 24, 2015

'So,' he asked, 'How do you feel about three in a bed?'

'I'm not sure,' she replied, 'I think two hot water bottles are probably enough . .'

— Fifty Shades of Gran (@50ShadesGran) January 24, 2015

'Do you know what to do with these?' I asked holding up a pair of handcuffs. 'Of course!' she said and knitted a cosy pic.twitter.com/g1T2aYOi9j

— Fifty Shades of Gran (@50ShadesGran) January 24, 2015

'Hurt me!' she cried, bending over the dining table. 'Alright,' I said, 'You've got varicose veins and your homemade jam is too sweet.'

— Fifty Shades of Gran (@50ShadesGran) January 23, 2015

She stared up at me, smiled seductively and slowly bit her lip. Those new dentures were taking a while to get used to.

— Fifty Shades of Gran (@50ShadesGran) January 22, 2015