COMEDY

Seagull News Stories Are Met With Sour Responses From British Seagull Community

22/07/2015 16:12 BST | Updated 22/07/2015 16:59 BST

A recent spate of bad press for their species has caused uproar in the British seagull community, with stories such as the Daily Star's "Psycho Seagulls Keep Out Illegals" circulating in avian social media circles.

The Daily Star's front page, which focused on a story about "psycho" seagulls stopping migrants from travelling to the UK from Calais, was deemed "defamatory to the species" by most, but the right-wing corners of seagull media are lauding it as a triumph.

Religious extremists have also been involved, decrying the story that humans couldn't be banned from feeding seagulls because it "violates religious rights".

Meanwhile the more centred right-wingers have been arguing over the UK government's "war on seagulls".

And then there was David Cameron's admittance that a seagull had "stolen his ham".

And then the entertainment-frenzied side of the species clocked on to news that Simon Cowell had been forced to buy tiny crash helmets for his dogs because seagulls kept pecking their heads.

Meanwhile various sections of the avian community were shocked and dismayed to hear of Truro council's decision to temporarily blind birds to stop them eating peoples' chips.

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