Brexit Vote Could Have Seen Remain Win If 'Only People Who Changed Underpants Daily Voted'

'Because Remain voters leave little piss stains and have to be changed regularly.'
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A Brexit poll on how frequently people wash their clothes has suggested that if only people who changed their underpants every day were allowed to vote, the UK would have chosen to remain in the EU.

Just let that sink in a while.

That’s the verdict of an election analyst who scanned a critical eye over the results of a YouGov poll of the nation’s clothes-washing habits.

It found 89% of Remain voters changed their undies every day compared to 81% of Leave voters.

This difference could have been enough to swing the 51.9% - 48.1% result of the EU referendum in June.

YouGov

Leave voters are also twice as likely to have chosen “not applicable” when asked how often they change their undergarments leading to the possibility they’re either going commando or have one very special and incredibly crusty favoured pair.

Perhaps even more worrying is the one per cent of people in both political camps who apparently have no idea at all how old the clothing encompassing their unmentionables is changed.

Remarkable.

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