Dads of Reddit have opened up to reveal the moments they’ve whispered to their kids: “Your mum doesn’t need to know about this”.
Some of them involve the sneaky (but completely safe) times they slipped their child a treat they’re usually not allowed, but others are a bit more serious.
Either way, these stories are for dads’ ears only, so let’s just hope their partners aren’t scrolling through Reddit.
1. “Usually we give our eight-month-old baths in the tub, but if we’re pressed for time I just bring him into the shower with me. A few days ago he wriggled off my shoulder, fell forward, flipped around in the air and I caught him two inches from hitting the tub floor. His mum doesn’t need to know, he doesn’t need to know.”
2. “When my one-year-old shit on the kitchen floor, stepped in it, then walked around on our bathroom towels.”
-MDGiov.
3. “I took my older two sons to a baseball game. They were five and six at the time. We were waiting in line at a concession stand and the boys were both right next to me. I reached down to grab my five-year-old son’s hand and he was gone. I went into full panic mode. I was screaming his name, asking strangers if they saw him. I honestly thought he was gone. I ended up finding him, but I felt horrible.”
4. “Once I punctured a can of shaving cream with a pair of scissors while it rested on my leg in front of five-year-old daughter. ‘K, mum doesn’t need to know this, I told her.’”
- Macmon.
5. “Every morning in the car while I take my daughter to school I let her have a mint. Her mum says she’s not allowed so it’s our little secret. It matters to have things which are just for you two as well as things you share with others.”
- ij_brunhauer.
6. “When I was supposed to be watching my son (but I was only keeping an eye on him) and he took crayons to our newly-painted hallway. I repainted before my wife came home from work.”
7. “My son is only two, so he can’t really tell his mum too much. But because I only get to be with him some nights and every other weekend - I let him have chocolate milk after dinner. I always tell him: ‘Don’t tell mommy’ and he responds by putting his finger to his lips and doing a very loud ‘Shhhhhh!’. It’s the little things.”
8. “Let’s go with the time the oldest had just learned to walk. I was ‘watching him closely’ one day, opened up Reddit, and a few minutes later he walked over to me very proud of himself holding a 6 inch kitchen knife he’d found somewhere.”
- krakedhalo.
9. “Was in a lift, carrying my youngest daughter, with my eldest standing next to me. We go to our stop, I walked out, my eldest didn’t, saw her disappear behind the doors. I then ran up the stairs to meet her at the next level, hearing her screaming all the way.”
10. “Have a five-year-old and two-year-old. Most moments [I want to hide] involve me urinating in places other than a toilet.”
- AKroegs.
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