THE BLOG

Seven Steps to an Unstoppable You

05/02/2014 12:55 GMT | Updated 06/04/2014 10:59 BST

Each one of us is responsible for our own self. Awareness is the prerequisite for change. Those with low - self esteem quite simply, do not believe they are good enough, deep down. Dress sense, conversations and body language often send out signals of 'I am not worthy'. However, the paradox here is that often some of the most powerful, beautifully dressed, slim, incredibly

successful people have lack of self - confidence and low - self esteem.

In all fairness, insecurity happens to the best of us at times. However those with self - confidence are propelled by their insecurities rather than becoming paralyzed by them. You see, they don't put the needs of others before their own.

When we feel unimportant and apologize for taking up space in the world, everyone else becomes

more important, more worthy and more valuable than us and, of course, that means their needs instantly take priority.

When you possess self- confidence, self belief and high self esteem, you become unstoppable! Everyone has flaws, shortcomings and defects and every one of us experience obstacles and difficult days, but when you have self belief, high self esteem and self - confidence, you don't let any of this to hold you back.

You have to over ride that inner critic, which feeds you lies and often tells you that you are not good enough. Also ride over others who dump their insecurities, fears and issues on you. Give up plugging into their hang-ups, beliefs and self-righteous attitudes about how we ought to behave, think and feel.

Sure, everyone is entitled to a point of view, a belief, an opinion,but that all belongs to them so don't put it in your own bag and carry it around. Give it back.

If you want to be unstoppable, you have to be the final authority on your life. No church, no partner, no teacher, no guru, no organisation, no friend, no system knows more about what you feel or think or believe or need or want than you do.

Sure coaches and experts can advise you and offer suggestions and tips and techniques but you have to make a choice about how you live.

7 Steps to an Unstoppable You.

1. Relinquish Your Membership to The 'I'm Not Good Enough Club'.

Focus ONLY on your attributes and skills and talents.

Tell yourself DAILY you are MORE than good enough even when you slip up.

Respect and cherish your values.

feel worthy of having your needs and wants met.

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2. Be Kind to Your Mind.

Be aware of your limiting beliefs and constantly re-frame them.

Keep a success journal and add to it daily, regardless of the size.

Repeatedly say 'I accept every part of myself'.

Let go of the addiction to approval.

3. To Thine Self be True.

Appreciate yourself regardless of how others behave around you.

Stay 100% authentic.

Give up people pleasing.

Son't allow others to manipulate you to do whats good for them.

4. Trust Your Internal Compass - Your Intuition.

Get quiet each day and listen to you inner voice.

Challenge all negative thoughts.

Always be guided by your feelings.

If you get a 'gut' feeling or 'hunch' follow it.

5. Have High Expectations.

Get clarity around what you want.

Don't quit so easily.

Stay in the moment and stop projecting fear into the future.

Hang around with people who support your dreams.

6. Be Accountable.

Own up to anything that you are wrong about.

Set boundaries with those who try to take advantage.

Always take responsibility for your own decisions.

Regardless of what anyone says, you ALWAYS have a choice.

7. Don't be Aggressive, be Assertive.

Channel any anger you feel into being assertive..

Stand up and be heard.

Don't allow ANYONE to bully you.

Get out there and chase your visions, dreams and goals.

My hope is that you change the self - defeating messages you tell yourself and start today give yourself permission to be unstoppable. These 7 steps will not work unless you work them.

Why? - It's your time to shine. Annie

Annie Ashdown is author of Doormat Nor Diva Be and The Confidence Factor - 7 Secrets of Successful People. Available at WH Smith, Waterstones, Amazon and all other good bookstores.