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Top Tips on How to Deal Effectively With Criticism

01/04/2014 11:24 BST | Updated 31/05/2014 10:59 BST

Way back when I was a model and an actress and I would take every single piece of feedback that wasn't complimentary as a personal attack and as a criticism.

That went on for many years.

Why?

Because I was afraid that I wasn't good enough, smart enough, thin enough or funny enough and I'd always be judged for it. I didn't want to be criticized and I couldn't deal with negative

remarks about my looks, weight, talents, abilities or ideas.

Now I see how futile that all was - however at the time criticism crushed me within.

In fact it kept me stuck in fear and procrastination, as here's the thing if I didn't put myself out there I wouldn't be criticised, so it was safer to always be working on an idea, rather than submit it or working on me rather than present myself.

If you experience this same issue you will never maximise your full potential. Sure many people like to offer constructive feedback and if they do so in a gentle, yet assertive way we can learn from it and discuss it with them, but nobody likes to be criticised.

Here are my top tips on how to deal effectively with criticism.

The most common mistake is to take it personally. Many people cant find it within themselves to say anything positive and take pleasure from flagging up someone's shortcomings. Don't make it about you, as these people need to feel superior because they are so insecure and the only way they can do so is project their own flaws onto another person. They do it with everyone.

Take your responsibilities seriously and yourself lightly. Many people are jealous of our talents and skills so take it as a compliment that you have what they want. Make it make you more determined to succeed rather than let it crush you.

Smile as it definitely helps psychologically and by smiling you will motivate the other person to moderate their approach and demonstrate that they don't have the power to upset you.

Detach and stay silent as this exhibits it insignificant and illustrates you refuse to give it any energy. Plus it means you maintain a dignity that displays self respect.

You have a choice about how you react. Treat it as their problem, not your problem. Keep your dignity intact by not letting their unreasonable behaviour provoke you.

MAKE IT HAPPEN - YOU CAN DO IT.

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