So if you've been conscious for the past week or two you'll have seen that Naomi Wolf's recently released book Vagina: A New Biography has been getting its fair share of column inches.
Calling it Vagina is obviously designed for maximum shock value. Cunt would have been far more effective, but that's America for you. Still some distance to go.
I have to ask though, am I the only one that's bored rigid by feminists banging on about their vaginas?
I think via Germaine Greer and The Vagina Monologues we've surely got the message by now - It's in between your legs and there's a really sensitive bit of it that we, as men, ought to concentrate on to give you max pleasure. And we should be nice and kind and respectful to it at all times.
Most of us do our best.
But this constant reinforcement of The Vagina smacks of insecurity. Why the obsession Naomi? This isn't a symptom of some underlying issue with body image, is it? I hope not. Of course, aesthetically speaking, vaginas aren't exactly Constables. Neither in my opinion are male genitalia. But that's cool. Or is that not cool?
Whatever, by battering me senseless with how wonderful it is, and reinforcing IT with almost other-worldly powers, I'm starting to fear the bloody thing.
Geez, there'll be someone coming along next telling us their bits are so extraordinary they can
double up as a cheese grater.
Seriously though, there's something oddly childish about this buttressing of the vagina. It's mine! It's all mine. And I love it. Yes, yes, I really do. Love, love, LOVE IT! It's a very special thing. Really! Honestly, I do. It makes me feel good and you CAN'T take it away from me.'
Alright, calm down. I heard you. About 20 years ago.
I know that historically things have been tough for the female sex. I'm sure there are areas that we can all work on but I think we should count our blessings. These days you can be the darling of the Western World in a band called 'Pussy Riot.' Would an all-male band called 'Penis Frenzy' have garnered the same support? Doubt it.
A woman is free to divulge the intimate details of her vagina and is hailed as a radical, her book a breakthrough in feminist literature. If a man did the equivalent with a book called 'Cock,' he'd probably be dismissed as an ego-centric sex--obsessed weirdo. Possibly with good reason. A penis is just a penis. A vagina is just a vagina. Why embellish them with all these complications?
I am aware, by the way, that Vagina isn't just about the actual biological zone, but if you're going to call it that, then I'm assuming that's where you want me to focus. Really though, you should have called it, I Have Nothing Much To Say But I Thought I'd Say It Anyway then we could all get on with having orgasms or not.
On which point, does this obsessive concentration on the female orgasm really help matters? I think it just ups the pressure - both on men and women. Sure, some women have problems, some don't. Some men have issues, and some don't. Some people can run really quickly and others can't. Help is out there.
Most notably, Wolf does come up in the book with the supposedly 'new' revelation that the
vagina is connected to the brain.
Fuck me; 'A' for effort right there.