Make a New Year's Affirmation - Resolutions Just Get Broken

If you believe the Mayans, 2012 heralds the end of the world. So we might as well enjoy every bit of it.

If you believe the Mayans, 2012 heralds the end of the world. So we might as well enjoy every bit of it.

Magazines at the moment are full of celeb predictions; will Pippa Middleton and Harry get it on, fat busting programmes; bingo-wing classes are all the rage in the UK and hot fashion tips; zebra is 'in', apparently.

While Facebook statuses are littered with resolutions and promises.

Everyone has great intentions but our goals are often just too unrealistic. So by the end of January everyone is back to smoking, eating crisps between meals and screaming in traffic jams.

For me resolutions are about problems - whereas the cause, whats behind them, is more important.

Is over-eating due to low self-esteem? Smoking some addictive streak? Working too hard an avoidance of being alone?

Worse is when you break them and feel a total failure.

I have had a tough year - with rays of sunshine such wonderful wedding to my beau - but lots of dark clouds ending 2011 with a miscarriage. I wrote about it as it happened and my blog can be read here.

So for me any commitments for 2012 need to ring true - stepping stones to dreams rather than ideals in themselves.

As I have shared so much already on the HuffPost, here are my personal affirmations. An affirmation is not a binding agreement. For me it is a flavour or theme that will shape the coming year. Something to help organise our life, rather than dictate to it.

2012 affirmations:

Enjoy the moment. A coffee, walk in the park, time with friends. The past is history, the future is a mystery which is why the present is a gift. It sounds corny, but the present is so squeezed either side that it gets overlooked or forgotten. I have spoilt many a dinner or special moment worrying about what's around the corner. And funnily enough, worrying about the future turned the future into something worrisome.

Live simply. We overclutter our lives with stuff, all kinds of different stuff. We are on our iPads whilst chatting to our loved ones AND watching TV. We do too many things, so we miss out on the detail. Do one thing at a time.

Love love. For me it is one of life's greatest gift. I have found love later and I want to enjoy every moment. If you haven't met the right person yet, be sure he or she is out there. I had lost faith in relationships and had resigned myself to being a single independent woman. I was wrong. Love is for everyone and it's expansive. The more you love the better. Love also the people you choose to be in your life. If you don't love them ask yourself why they are there.

Live well, but have one naughty day. To give up everything bad - whether chips, cigs or chocolate - and start a new healthy regime all in one go is hard, so go easy on yourself and allow one day of treats.

Follow your passions. I was stuck in a job that I tolerated for many years. I was then forced to leave it. It was the best thing that happened to me. It liberated me to do what I always wanted and loved - acting and writing. Don't wait to be fired like I was. Take the leap and switch careers or vocations. It is never too late.

Do new things. Try out stuff beyond your comfort zone. The extreme version of this is do something every day that scares you. But for most of us that's a step too far. No one likes being afraid. Go to a gallery you haven't been to, start that cooking course you always dreamed of doing, discover a new continent. Nourish your spirit.

Create positive vibes. It is easy to fall into trap of seeing the glass half empty - from the economic crisis to no man in your life. If you believe shit will happen then you guessed it will.

Most of all, be flexible and free to follow your intuition, even if it means ignoring all the above promises. So long as it is your truth.

I wish you all a brilliant 2012.

Whatever that means for you.

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