THE BLOG

How To: Work From F**king Home

13/01/2017 12:22 GMT | Updated 18/01/2017 09:40 GMT
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It's 8 am - you've been up since 5 and you're getting the kids ready for school, or at least out the door. He's fannying about still half in his jammies, half in his uniform. You shout for the MILLIONTH time: "Shoes lad, where's your shoes?!"

In among the spilt cat food and three day old wet washing you think: 'fuck, I've got that quote to do before 9am, follow up with that customer from yesterday, check the financial reports and get back to that guy who wants me to do some event thing...'

You return from the school run only to find that you've forgotten it's shitting blue wheelie bin day! Not to mention a lingering doubt about the integrity of your 8 year old's ability to hand over dinner money. You're resigned to the fact that the drive to the office isn't going to work, you've got too much to do and the afternoon meetings are closer to home.

So... what do you do?

You stumble past all that shite lying in the hall and make a break for the kitchen table. 30 minutes into your emails that you were NOT supposed to open before starting on the actual work you think: 'Huh, I know, I'll just sort that washing out and load the dish washer whilst I'm thinking about over a million and one other things that need doing'. Before you know it you've spent your day in and out of different tasks not completing any and the house is still a shit-pit regardless of your half arsed attempts. 3.15pm: it's time to get the kids and chaos descends once more.

What if there was a better way?

Imagine a world where you are not shackled by the restraints of your never ending house of doom. Imagine a place you can call your own [fade out wavy dreaming-ness]...

It's got the best set-up in there. I'm thinking some decent WiFi for a start, a cracking chair [soft but structured], a desk big enough to dance on should the notion take you. A bookcase filled with half-read guru bollocks, how-tos and those amazing 'got you right in the feels' all-time keepers. A Nespresso gifted to you by the in-laws, sure it's not a full cup of coffee but it's fucking amazing coffee so have two.

You've got your tech - some sort of Sonos or Alexa to set you up with the best playlist you've ever known. What about some underfloor heating. It's on a timer so you literally have nothing to think about. 20mins before you arrive, it's already warm. BOOM.

You step in and there isn't a child's sock in sight! It's just your stuff - all untampered and non-kid infested. Amazing! You've got your plan all set up for the day, coffee on tap and everything where it should be. Yeah the house is over there, but it's over there! Not here, not where you're comfy and free from that world.

And so, you get on. You get on with everything you wanted to get on with all those times before, but you actually do it, and do it well. You're more relaxed, productive and alert - fuck you might even start eating a proper healthy lunch instead of the kid's crusts from breakfast... (aye okay one step at a time). But you get the picture.

This place my friend, is the place that queens and kings basque in the glory of their own success. This is... THE SHED.

It's not rocket science, get out the house get into the shed and actually make something worth working for.

I'm not the first to contemplate it or even use it, take a look at a world of creators who merrily made their magic in a place of tranquil retreat... Roald Dahl, Walt Disney, Harley Davidson, Steve Jobs - all in the shed-life creators.

I'm not saying you won't achieve great things without one (you totally won't), but imagine how much more fun it would be and what a story you could tell with a humble beginning.

#Shedlife

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