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How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

02/06/2014 16:04 BST | Updated 28/07/2014 10:59 BST

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Whether it's with a friend on Facebook, your partners ex, a celebrity in a magazine or the high flyer in the office; we've all done it.

Are you comparing your insides with someone else's outsides?

Queue wild imaginings about how interesting/happy/good in bed that other person must be. In comparison to what we perceive as perfection, we'll always come up short.

I spotted this picture on Twitter last week from Action for Happiness and it really struck a chord with me. The perceptions we have of other people, whether based on their appearance, money, or the amazing, adventurous life they post all over Facebook, is only ever half the story. However it's all too common for us to hang our self worth on comparisons with a perfected image that someone projects.

One thing I've learned as a hypnotherapist is that no matter how perfect someone may look, how impressive a job they may have or how much money they earn, everyone is dealing with something and appearances are so very rarely what they seem.

Remember that people, magazines and social media will often only display their best points. You are a work in progress; you don't need to be perfect to be happy. In fact, the one habit most closely associated with happiness is self-acceptance.

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Here are some tips for overcoming comparisonitus;

- Remind yourself daily that you are good enough, you HAVE enough and you ARE enough. I have this stuck to my mirror on a post-it as a reminder.

- If fashion magazines make you feel bad, it's time to give them up.

- Make a daily list of all the things you're grateful for, things that you like about yourself and things that you do well. This simple act is scientifically proven to boost happiness and satisfaction!

- Work on changing the way you speak to yourself. Would you criticise a best friend harshly? Compare a best friend to others? Don't do it to yourself.

- There will always be people who are 'better' or 'worse' than you in some way. Remember, no one in the world can do a better job of being you than you. You have something unique to offer the world, so work on being the best version of you that you can. Remind yourself that everyday, in some way, you are getting better.

Talk to me about how hypnotherapy can help you to feel more confident, boost self esteem and learn how to accept yourself.

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