As well as sapping all semblance of civilization and basic human dignity from existence, this modern world, that you are all so very proud of, has ruined the talkies too. Computers, phones, internet, cyborgs; they've all combined to suck the mystery out of life (especially the cyborgs). And when the...

I am a violently handsome man. The three phrases I hear most in my day-to-day life are "Hey, put that down", "The authorities have been alerted" and "Jeepers creepers but you are a fine looking gentleman and no mistake". It's a living hell.

You would think that being uniquely, tremendously...

I have killed a man. I am not proud of this fact. But I had no choice. He looked at my jerry can.

I am Nordus - head of the clan Sexlior. In the old world I was known as 'Keith' and I was a leading sales representative for a...

So, I had mapped out a whole screed about women in comedy and the insanity of the 'women aren't funny' thing and the under-representation of females in humour and blah-di-blah. I'd planned to assemble some devastating arguments, formulate some delightful counterpoints and had lined up some really tremendous swear words...

The whole nation has rallied around Michael Gove's heroic call to buy the Queen a big yacht for her birthday. It's the only sensible thing to do. While the vast majority of sane, normal people have applauded this fabulous and necessary idea, there have been some, union types mainly, who...

Comedy is all about recognition. Michael McIntyre points out one of life's foibles. You recognise said foible, then chuckle lightly and die a little on the inside. But there is a thin, unfunny line between highlighting some hilarious, unearthed observation and lazily trotting out a creaky comedy cliché that was...

1984. The year a man called George Orwell predicated the world would end in a book of the same name. But the world failed to end. Thanks to one man. A humble, dishevelled man. A singer, a balladeer, a mere minstrel. A man who threw off the shackles of light...