One sentence that is guaranteed to cause more bloodshed than anything else.
Hi! My name is Dan Howell and I am a 21-year-old full-time YouTube video blogger (internet hobo who spends all day in pyjamas) who goes under the embarrassing-teenage-username of danisnotonfire.
This blog is designed for me to give a glimpse into what it is like to make video blogs as well as for me to give some backstory to the videos I make and the creative process behind them!
Now, usually my videos are editing-heavy storytelling experiences in which I tell the whole world about my many, many flaws so they can point and laugh at me, but this week I thought I would do something a bit more relaxed and conversational.
One thing I have made a habit of joking about is the inevitability of causing a 'shitstorm' in the comments whenever I ask my viewers to express their opinions on the topic. As we all know how well opinions go down on the Internet. Usually, this doesn't actually happen and the comments are mostly hilarious and witty and stay on topic. This time however, I may have succeeded in creating my first ever actual shitstorm.
The plan was with the help of a female friend (Miss Carrie Fletcher) to simply discuss the biological differences between Men and Women to see who, as nature intended, has it harder. I'm sure we're all aware this is pretty one-sided before we even begin, but that was the point as it was just supposed to be light entertainment. (hahaha.. hm)
However of course (why God, why always me?) this week the planets seem to have aligned and spotlighted my video for all the world to see! Surely a good thing? Well inviting thousands of unfamiliar people of both sexes to one place is probably not the most stable environment as it is, and I'm not sure who triggered the avalanche, but sure enough the comments have completely derailed from the actual video into the social oppression of women throughout history while 13 year old boys are leaving comments saying 'girls smell!1' and people are firing off wonderful facts such as:
The only thing more painful than givinig birth is burning alive.
CIENTIFECT FACT- Giving birth for a woman is the same as peeing out a marble for men !!!!!!!
Scientifically speaking getting kicked in the nuts is equal to multiple child births all at once.
(getting kicked in the balls depending on how hard is about 9000 units of pain which is equal to breaking all the bones in your body 200 times)
Wonderful. Some of them are probably completely true but the contradiction is amazing.
Anyway, my subscribers and I are having an amazing time sitting back and watching the war unfold with a bag of popcorn and if anything it has reaffirmed my love for the Internet, and particularly YouTube users, even more.
I hope you enjoy the video in whatever way you may feel compelled to react to it, and I will see you next week, probably with some anecdote about me walking into a pane of glass or being bullied by a 4 year old.
See you on the Internet, and goodbye!
Follow Dan Howell on Twitter: www.twitter.com/danisnotonfire