Pippa's bum! - sigh...
That was not a sigh of desire for Miss Middleton's backside but one of despair at the continuing obsession with it.
Like there has never been - or never will be - another shapely bum in the world, it keeps getting mentioned long after its official debut at the Royal Wedding and looks set to become (albeit with the desire for the rest of Pippa's figure) the new target of achievement for a 'perfect' body.
Last weekend the Daily Mail's 'You' magazine ran a feature with extracts from a work-out book by Pippa's Pilates guru - Margot Campbell - which after exclaiming "Happy New Rear!" (Groan) they went on to claim that it will "Give you fabulous curves like Pippa's"
Of course there is an element of marketed appeal here but the desire or hope of attaining the bum/figure will for most outweigh the likelihood of it being achievable, for the many and obvious reasons.
I'm not suggesting its all lies, of course any exercise for most is a very good thing and any encouragement to do some is important; you may even end up with curves like hers but punting Pippa's posterior as the reason just doesn't seem right to me.
For sure if she had an arse like a sack of potatoes there would have been some harsh comments in the press with unflattering photos before she faded into the background and there would have been none of the Pippa botty-based madness last year.
Instead there was a frenzy of focus on her rear and such things occurred as a restaurant creating a Pippa picture from jam, Marmite and crumpets (There is a pun there somewhere - crude or otherwise) then there was the woman that daubed her man's car with - Is Pippa's Bum Still Better Than Mine???- after he was a bit too frank in his appreciation of it and even rapper Tinie Tempah was quoted as saying that he didn't see what all the fuss was about.
So things have progressed now from the celebration and coveting of it to 'you too can have a Pippa bottom!'
But come on ladies and gentleman, it's just a bum! And some will always look better than others; so unless this particular one is about to bring about world peace, avert a hostile alien invasion or launch a solo singing career it will remain just that - a bum.
So be it that you desire to have one shaped like Pippa's (Or even just want to get your hands on one like it) remember most people are greater than the sum of their parts (as I am sure Miss Middleton is) so don't rank yourself bottom - just because you don't have that bottom!Suggest a correction