THE BLOG

Holiday Romances, Are They to Be Avoided?

28/08/2014 11:46 BST | Updated 27/10/2014 09:59 GMT
Bernd Opitz via Getty Images

Holidays are not just a time to relax. They're also the time when we experience new things and have new adventures. For many people that includes a holiday romance. Can they ever work back home? Do you want them to work when you get back home?

A holiday romance can feel like a whirlwind adventure. To quote Grease, 'Summer lovin', had me a blast, Summer lovin' happened so fast'. However, a holiday romance can teach you a lot about yourself; what you like and dislike and what is most important to you. Holiday romances give you a chance to try things you wouldn't do in your everyday life at home.

It's important you establish what it is you want from a holiday romance. Do you want to move on from someone or a past relationship? Do you just want a bit of attention and fun? Do you want a long term relationship? If it is something casual you are after? Be aware that things could become more complicated if you become intimate. The bonding hormone oxytocin is released when having sex which may make you feel more attached then you'd planned.

What are the signs of a holiday romance that might last?

• When it's just as much about conversation as it is chemistry. You feel comfortable with each other and have spent time getting to know each other.

• You've both talked about your life at home and you've thought about whether your home lifestyles are compatible.

• Your values and sense of humour are similar.

• You both want to stay in touch after the holiday.

• You're willing to share your lives with each other e.g. introducing your family and friends

It's unlikely that you'll meet someone who lives in the same area or even country as you. Long distance relationships can work but you'll both need to be prepared to make a real effort. Language can also play a huge factor when developing a long-term relationship with someone. Communicating in a language that is not your own can be challenging i.e. humour doesn't always translate. If you don't speak the same language, is that something you are comfortable with?

Culture clashes can also happen once returning home. A friend of mine began dating a guy she had met on holiday in India. He had many wonderful qualities and visited her in England several times. However, the more time they spent together the more apparent their cultural differences became. He became frustrated with having to constantly explain aspects of his culture. This does not mean that cultural differences are insurmountable, for some couples they add spice and interest into their relationship.

Whatever your intentions for your holiday romance, make it clear where you'd like it to go and be realistic about your options. Be sure to enjoy your holiday and create brilliant memories as Dr Seuss once wrote, 'Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.'