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Charlie Brooker's Best Zingers From 2016 Wipe

'He resembles a cling film parcel of Frankfurter meat that’s been kicked through a yellow cobweb'.

29/12/2016 23:28 | Updated 29 December 2016
BBC

Writer and journalist Charlie Brooker’s annual review of the news has become a staple of the BBC festive TV schedule. And in 2016, Wipe had more to get it’s teeth into than usual following a seismic year that included Brexit, the election of Donald Trump, the Tory leadership election, the Labour leadership election, and much more.

Here are his best takedowns of the political class who defined the 12 months. 

Nigel Farage

On the EU referendum being ‘real people’ versus ‘elites’:

“If you don’t know the difference, former City trader Nigel Farage is a real person, whereas refugee-loving Gary Lineker is an elitist.”

BBC

On Farage’s ‘un-resignation’ as Ukip leader: 

“The human equivalent of a pop-up advert you just can’t click away.”

On the EU referendum ‘breaking point’ anti-migration poster:

“As Farage posed for snaps it looked like he was at the front of the queue - a bit like his Huguenot ancestors were when they migrated here.”

BBC

Jeremy Corbyn

“Former Labour Shadow Chancellor Ed Balls wowed the nation with his incredible appearances on Strictly Come Dancing. Not to be outdone, Jeremy Corbyn astonished millions by dancing on Labour’s grave.”

On saying his support for staying in the EU was 7/10:

“Oozing pro-EU enthusiasm like a stone oozes blood.”

BBC

Donald Trump

“He resembles a cling film parcel of Frankfurter meat that’s been kicked through a yellow cobweb.”

BBC

Michael Gove

“The ‘Leave’ campaign had grassroots support from everyday folk such as Michael Gove - seen here slumming it on a dress down Friday.”

BBC

On losing early in the Tory leadership campaign:

“Come the first round Gove proved to be as popular as a turd in a softplay.” 

Boris Johnson 

“’Leave’ bagged an even bigger working class hero in the form of horny-handed everyman, Bullingdon Club grandee, Telegraph columnist and megabucks TV star Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson.”

BBC

Boris Johnson and Michel Gove

On their shocked look after the Brexit vote victory:

“Even though they had won a surprise victory, Johnson and Gove were acutely aware millions hadn’t voted ‘Leave’. So they were at pains not to look too triumphantalist. They pulled sick and haunted expressions instead, which was thoughtful of them.”

BBC

David Cameron

On the former-PM’s reddening face:

“He’s off the Cameron pink scale. This is ‘pumps me up’, right now he’s gone past ‘gammon’. He’s going to blow.”

BBC
BBC

Tory leadership contenders

“With Bozza gone, the remaining contenders were lined up on the news like unlockable character options on the worst iPad game of all time.”

BBC
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