PARENTS

Differences Between Christmas Before and After Becoming A Parent

So much planning.

20/12/2016 09:21

Everyone talks about the magic of family at Christmas, but to be honest we sort of preferred it when it was just us and a bottle of eggnog. 

Now we have to roast four types of potato, risk our lives collecting presents in Argos, and then give Father Christmas all the credit.

These are the 8 ways Christmas is different before and after becoming a mum.

1. The weeks before Christmas. 

Before Kids: Office Christmas parties, sequin dresses, impromptu dinners with friends and mulled wine at 4 o’clock in the afternoon. 

After Kids: Working out how to make a nativity costume out of toilet rolls.  

2. Budgeting for December. 

Before kids: Being bankrupt because your Christmas social calendar is not compatible with your salary.

After kids:  Being bankrupt because you just found out how much a Hatchimal is going to cost you on Ebay. 

3. Receiving Christmas presents. 

Before Kids: Being given clothes, perfume, jewellery, and your favourite wine. 

After Kids: Getting a hoover, some marigolds and the ‘joy’ of watching your little ones open their presents.

4. Decorating the Christmas tree.

Before Kids: A Pinterest inspired Instagrammable effort, complete with a full set of (non-broken) decorations. 

After Kids: You’re just satisfied if the tree stays upright for 24 hours. 

5. The night before Christmas.

Before Kids: Going to the pub and getting incredibly drunk with no cares for the morning. 

After Kids: Spending hours silently trying to assemble flatpack toys without waking the children up. 

6. Christmas morning. 

Before Kids: Getting up ‘early’ at about 9am and spending the whole day in your pyjamas waiting to be fed. 

After Kids: Being woken up at 3.40am by someone on the end of your bed and then trying to stop everyone from opening their presents.

7. Making Christmas lunch. 

Before Kids: If you could be bothered you popped a tray of pigs in blankets in the oven, but you always went to someone else’s house. 

After Kids: You’re up basting a giant bird at the crack of dawn. 

8. Christmas TV. 

Before Kids: The Queen’s Speech and then falling asleep in front of It’s A Wonderful Life. 

After Kids: Harry Potter marathon followed by Ratatouille. 

9. Boxing Day 

Before Kids: Regretting the amount of Baileys you drank yesterday. 

After Kids: Regretting the amount of Baileys you drank yesterday. 

At least some things never change. 

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