For many singletons, their idea of romance is going to bed with a partner, spooning all night, and waking up together, feeling nothing but bliss and satisfaction.
Something like this:
The reality, however, is a bit less romantic, especially for couples who have been together for a long time.
Basically, going to bed can look a lot like this:
And a new survey confirms that the more you (literally) sleep with a romantic partner, the more they get under your skin.
Mattress Inquirer asked 1,000 people who frequently share a bed about what really irritates them when they turn off the lights.
Surprisingly, snoring wasn’t the top bedroom pet peeve — hogging the blanket was!
After snoring (which came in at No. 2), people get frustrated when their bedroom buddy tosses and turns; external noises such as honking; and when their partner eats in bed.
Other findings showed that men get more frustrated by partners who eat in bed, and are more agitated by a partner who lets their pet sleep in the bed. Women’s top pet peeves are a partner who hogs the covers and snoring, followed by tossing and turning, and farting in the bed.
According to a report in the Daily Mail, women’s bodies lose heat more easily than men’s, which explains why having enough of the blanket rates as the No. 1 concern for them.
And because research shows men are more likely to suffer from snoring than women, heterosexual women are more likely to have to deal with a snoring male partner in bed, which is why it tied with blanket hogging as their top bedroom pet peeve.
Because of these aggravators, some couples choose to sleep in separate beds, and some studies have found that occasionally sleeping apart can make a relationship happier over time.
The survey found married women were the most likely to enjoy a night in bed to themselves from time to time, with 17 per cent reporting often wanting to sleep separately from their spouse. Married men, on the other hand, were less likely to enjoy a night alone, with less than eight per cent sharing the same sentiment as women.
But even despite all these pet peeves, many people still want to sleep side-by-side with their partner.
“A lot of people have sleep issues and still want to share a bed,” Paul Rosenblatt, author of Two in a Bed: The Social System of Couple Bed Sharing, told Chatelaine in 2013.
There's a symbol of intimacy related to sharing a bed that's important to people.
“There’s a symbol of intimacy related to sharing a bed that’s important to people; your partner is the only person you’re doing that with.” Other reasons for sharing a bed with a partner include sexual access, privacy from children, and the ability to talk in the dark without distraction.
“Physical intimacy is important, too,” said Rosenblatt. “People need to touch and be touched, and if you’re sharing a bed it’s a lot easier.”
People need to touch and be touched, and if you’re sharing a bed it’s a lot easier.
But if you do find yourself being kept up at night, whether it’s because of blanket hogging, snoring, noises from outside, or just stress and anxiety, it’s important to resolve these issues so you do get a good night’s sleep.