Dads Reveal Their 'Your Mum Doesn't Need To Know' Moments On Reddit

Oops.

02/02/2017 16:04

Dads of Reddit have opened up to reveal the moments they’ve whispered to their kids: “Your mum doesn’t need to know about this”.

Some of them involve the sneaky (but completely safe) times they slipped their child a treat they’re usually not allowed, but others are a bit more serious. 

Either way, these stories are for dads’ ears only, so let’s just hope their partners aren’t scrolling through Reddit. 

- locrifa - via Getty Images

1. “Usually we give our eight-month-old baths in the tub, but if we’re pressed for time I just bring him into the shower with me. A few days ago he wriggled off my shoulder, fell forward, flipped around in the air and I caught him two inches from hitting the tub floor. His mum doesn’t need to know, he doesn’t need to know.”

2. “When my one-year-old shit on the kitchen floor, stepped in it, then walked around on our bathroom towels.”

3. “I took my older two sons to a baseball game. They were five and six at the time. We were waiting in line at a concession stand and the boys were both right next to me. I reached down to grab my five-year-old son’s hand and he was gone. I went into full panic mode. I was screaming his name, asking strangers if they saw him. I honestly thought he was gone. I ended up finding him, but I felt horrible.”

4. “Once I punctured a can of shaving cream with a pair of scissors while it rested on my leg in front of five-year-old  daughter. ‘K, mum doesn’t need to know this, I told her.’”

Macmon.

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5. “Every morning in the car while I take my daughter to school I let her have a mint. Her mum says she’s not allowed so it’s our little secret. It matters to have things which are just for you two as well as things you share with others.”

6. “When I was supposed to be watching my son (but I was only keeping an eye on him) and he took crayons to our newly-painted hallway. I repainted before my wife came home from work.”

7. “My son is only two, so he can’t really tell his mum too much. But because I only get to be with him some nights and every other weekend - I let him have chocolate milk after dinner. I always tell him: ‘Don’t tell mommy’ and he responds by putting his finger to his lips and doing a very loud ‘Shhhhhh!’. It’s the little things.”

8. “Let’s go with the time the oldest had just learned to walk. I was ‘watching him closely’ one day, opened up Reddit, and a few minutes later he walked over to me very proud of himself holding a 6 inch kitchen knife he’d found somewhere.”

9. “Was in a lift, carrying my youngest daughter, with my eldest standing next to me. We go to our stop, I walked out, my eldest didn’t, saw her disappear behind the doors. I then ran up the stairs to meet her at the next level, hearing her screaming all the way.”

10. “Have a five-year-old and two-year-old. Most moments [I want to hide] involve me urinating in places other than a toilet.”

AKroegs

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