This Guy Got His Testicles Stuck In An Ikea Chair

"The skipper and two sailors" almost lost one of their trio.

07/09/2016 11:36

Swedish furniture megastore Ikea has come under fire from a customer for a rather peculiar reason.

Norwegian Claus Jørstad wrote a lengthy message on the company’s regional Facebook page claiming he got his testicles stuck in the holes on one of their chairs.


Jørstad, 45, said he placed the stool in his shower to give him some respite during his daily cleaning routine and was soaping up when he noticed one of his plums had become lodged in one of the openings on the seat.

“Sitting there and noticing the accident, I bent down to see what the fuck happened, I realised the little nutter has got stuck,” he wrote on Facebook.

But the turmoil didn’t end there. Due to the sensitive nature of the trapped appendage, and the rising temperature causing his testicle to swell, Jørstad soon found himself unable to free his bits from the chair.

Naked, trapped, and out of ideas, the worried Norwegian was probably moments away from some ‘127 Hours’ style escape when the water turned cold by itself and luckily reduced the size of his “skipper and two sailors,” as he calls them. The shift in temperature allowed Jørstad to free himself and his little sailors live to see another day.

The fine people of Ikea Norway suggested he wear suitable attire for his next trip to the improvised sit-down shower, but he had other ideas on how to make the stool testicle-safe.

In case you’re wondering, he calls it the “weinermonkey.”

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