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83% of Articles Uploaded 'Without Websites Even Checking Content'

22/01/2015 13:42 GMT | Updated 18/03/2015 09:59 GMT

Research released today suggests that websites like Huffpo, Upworthy and Buzzfeed upload submissions to their websites without reading any of the actual words, so long as it is attached to a shocking and easily shareable headline. The research further suggests that as long as interesting, but probably factually inaccurate subheadings are used, writers can get away with putting irrelevant or even dangerous content on the internet.

Details of the findings suggest:

93% of subheadings bear no relation to the subsequent words

I am a servant of the Dark One, and the time of retribution is at hand. A blessed fire shall reign over what you call 'civilisation', bringing us closer to His domain of malice. 'Reason', 'truth' and 'beauty' are a great cosmic joke, but the Dark One sees through all lies and shall unleash the Final Abyss.

75% of websites are so keen to gain advertising revenue from articles written for free that they pass over most of what the piece has to say, regardless of what the consequences might be

The Altar of Blackness stands ready. The first to be sacrificed shall be the actor Hugh Bonneville, off of Downton Abbey. He's the one that plays the main lord guy, you know the one. Then all the rest of the braying masses shall be forced to account for their participation in the carousel of meaninglessness that is the world.

61.3% of all internet content is uploaded because editors have skimmed over the article's headings, rather than because they have thought about what the article might mean

But I am not alone. A silent army lives amongst you, ready at a moment's notice to purify this world. They merely need to know that there are others out there, such as myself, who have recognised 'love' and 'kindness' for what they are - empty signifiers, pointing toward the blasted heath of reality. Prepare yourselves for the Final War, oh followers of the King of Nothingness!

About three-quarters of subeditors do not even perform the basic function of a subeditor - to spellcheck content

Teh time off blakcness is neering, be preparped!

Two thirds of such websites are so focussed on generating clicks that they have no guiding value system based on integrity, verification or thoughtfulness

I first discovered the truth of the Earl of Shadows when Sarah left me. I didn't care about her going at all - it genuinely didn't affect me. But after a few weeks of not leaving the house and searching through obscure internet forums I began to see a pattern in the universe - the beautiful pattern of merciless chaos. I realised that love is mankind's sick joke to itself. I hope she's 'happy' now with 'Chris' (who looks a lot like the actor Hugh Bonneville, off of Downton Abbey).

The research concludes that because people expect to enjoy writing for free, websites rely entirely on advertising and therefore clickrates rather than having principles of editorial integrity

Oooooooooooooooooooo Dark One/ Unshackle the world from its axis/ Spin us into the starless black/ corrode life, corrode love, corrode us down to our souls/ Our empty, empty souls!