1. It's all you will talk about. Your family will be bored of you, your friends will be bored of you, even your beloved partner will be bored of you (but woe betide them if they dare tell you so)!
2. The bridesmaids will argue! With you, with each other, with anyone who mentions the wedding or looks in their direction for too long.
3. It doesn't matter how conventional you think your families are, when it comes to putting a table plan together - a Vegas registry office will become very appealing! Trust me on this one!
4. There won't be a corner of your house not filled with empty jam jars, ribbons, scraps of lace, favour boxes, mirror plates and anything else that seemed a good idea at the time.
5. Men don't and never will understand chair covers, so when he sees that there is £300 dedicated to it, you WILL argue all night and one of you (if not both) will threaten to call the whole thing off!
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6. It doesn't matter how much you plan and organise, as you're due to leave the house on the morning of your special day, you will have lost your garter or earrings and won't want to get married any more!
7. There's always an 'old aunt Mable' who will criticise every detail of the wedding, because 'favours and centre pieces' weren't done in her day and she's been married 86 years! Oh, and don't get her started on the volume of the band!
8. If you're getting married in England, it will rain. It doesn't matter if you book it in the middle of what was forecast to be an 'Indian summer' it will rain all bloody day!
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9. People will turn up at your wedding after RSVP'ing 'No' and they will probably bring a +1 and 3 kids too!
10. Some kid (probably one that you don't even know) will scream through the whole ceremony and remind you why you wanted to opt for the 'adult only' day.
11. Someone will post a picture of you on Facebook before your evening guests have seen you! It doesn't matter how politely you ask not to or which fancy poem you use to do the same job, you will have 20 phones pointed at your face all day.
12. You will get a little bit of pee on your wedding dress, it will happen, you can only hold so many layers of silk and net. Don't even fight it.
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