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Laura Price

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Dear Santa, All I Want for Christmas Is My Hair Back

Posted: 17/12/2012 23:00

Dear Santa,

I never imagined I would spend most of the year fighting breast cancer. Please bring me a full head of hair in 2013 and a cancer-free future for me and all those I love!

Best wishes,

Laura Price, aged 30 ¼, bald and bored of the big 'C'. xx

P.S. Here's the final installment of my chemotherapy diary...

My Chemotherapy Diary: Part IV

Nov. 26: The day before my sixth and final chemotherapy session, the telephone rings. It's Gareth Evans, professor in medical genetics.

"Laura," he says. "It's good news. You got the all-clear."

I could cry with relief. Seven weeks ago, I took a blood test for the BRCA1 and BRCA2 breast cancer gene mutations and I've become more and more worked up about the result, anxious to know whether I need a double mastectomy, desperate to start planning my future.

Because my maternal grandmother had breast cancer in her 30s, I am expecting to test positive. Having the gene fault would mean having a double mastectomy now, getting my ovaries removed in my 40s, and possibly deciding not to have children so as not to pass on the gene fault. Thankfully, none of this will be necessary.

As I said in a previous blog post, I considered having a double mastectomy regardless of the result, to remove any future breast cancer risk, but after consultation with my oncologist, surgeon and geneticist, the consensus is it would be silly to undergo a huge, risky operation for a relatively small chance of breast cancer recurrence. After all, the greater risk to my life is that my breast cancer spreads elsewhere - my lymph nodes, lungs or bones, for instance - and having my breasts removed wouldn't stop this from happening. Nevertheless, I'm so happy about the result - 'relieved' is not the word.

2012-12-13-IMG_3617.JPGNov. 27: Not only am I elated about my gene test result and the fact that this is my final chemo, I'm also semi-high on pre-chemo steroids, so wearing the bunny onesie my friends got me for my 30th birthday seems like an excellent idea. Plus, it's freezing cold outside and I'm about to endure the usual ice torture that goes with Taxotere chemotherapy, so I figure the extra warmth from the bunny suit is ideal!

Strangely, nobody at the Christie Hospital bats an eyelid at my oversized, rabbit-shaped babygro - not even a grin from my oncologist as I exit his room, revealing my little white bunny tail! These people are clearly too used to seeing patients in their PJs...

The nurse gets the needle and cannula into my hand without the usual bother and the chemo infusion whizzes by without incident. Either the freezer at the Christie Clinic isn't working too well or I'm just getting tougher, but I don't find the frozen ice gloves on my hands and feet quite as painful as I did the last two sessions. Before I know it, the hard part is over and I'm out the door, hoping never to return for another chemotherapy round in my life!

Nov. 28-Dec. 1: For the first few days post-chemo, I feel absolutely fine. Alongside the chemo, I'm taking a fairly potent concoction of extra steroids, drugs to offset the side effects of the steroids, a daily self-injection to boost my immune system, Senokot to ward off the constipation and a few essential vitamins, but I manage to combat the usual insomnia and get plenty of sleep.

Dec. 1-4: When the effects of Taxotere kick in, they really do kick hard, and in my case, this happens over the weekend. At certain points during chemo, I feel as if time has stopped entirely, and everyone's life is just going on while mine is on hold. All I can do is lie in bed and stare into space, feeling depressed. It's just like when you spend a Saturday night in by yourself looking at everyone else having fun on your Facebook feed (which I do a fair bit), only times the feeling by a thousand.

The pain also starts to kick in - not as intense as in the previous rounds of Taxotere, but nevertheless an uncomfortable prickly pain in my legs, which later spreads to my back. I also have the usual coated tongue, sore mouth, extreme lethargy, headaches, horrible feeling in my mouth and terrible, terrible hot flushes - it's quite common to experience menopausal symptoms during chemo, but fortunately mine turn out to be side effects of the steroids, and not the menopause just yet. (Phew)

My veins are also twitching and pulsing, as if I can feel the chemo drugs pumping up and down my arm, and my muscles and joints are tight and sore from the lack of exercise. Who knew earlier this year when I was running several times a week that I'd be feeling like an arthritic 90-year-old, six months later?!

2012-12-13-IMG_3719.JPGDec. 5: Weirdly, my hair has started to grow back, beginning with a small patch on the back of my head that's growing faster than anywhere else. I am told hair can become resistant to chemo drugs and it's common for it to start growing back after the fifth chemo, but it's likely it will fall out again before it grows back properly.

My eyebrows and eyelashes, on the other hand, have been falling out gradually over the four months since starting chemo and are now thinner than ever before. Fortunately, with a good wig and a little make-up, I can just about transform myself from "Hairless and Ill" to "Healthy and Normal" within 10 minutes!

Dec. 7: I've had a higher-than-normal temperature for four days and a mild, tickly cough, so I decide to go to the doctor for a blood test and a few checks. He confirms I don't have a chest infection or any other visible infection, and the next day he calls me with the test results. Expecting extremely low levels of white blood cells and neutrophils (the ones that fight infection), both the doctor and I are a little surprised to find I have abnormally high levels of both - a sign that I may have an active infection and my immune system is - for once - fighting it.

A quick call to the oncologist, however, confirms the high white blood-cell count is probably just a result of the daily immune-boosting injections and everything is as it should be. Relief doesn't begin to describe how I feel that I don't have to go back to the hospital for another four days of being hooked to a drip and going to the toilet in a cardboard bowl!

Dec. 8-10: I spend a few days in London, visiting a nutritional therapist and seeing friends and family, and I'm so exhausted I end up going to bed at 8pm on a Saturday night. It's fair to say the cumulative effect of six rounds of chemo has left me more tired than ever and I'm pleased to head back to Yorkshire for a few nights of 12 hours' sleep.

Dec. 13: After about a month of having a very slight cough, the winter gets the better of me and I develop a full-blown, chesty, phlegmy cough and a painful sore throat. I wake up having largely lost my voice, and begin taking antibiotics. So much for having a super-strong immune system!

2012-12-13-IMG_3811.JPGDec. 17: It's almost three weeks after my final chemo and my hair is starting to look a little bit like that of a baby chick again. Amazingly, I even have some semblance of my beloved sideburns - I never thought I'd be so happy to see those sideburns again!

The nurse at the Christie says my baby-chick hair is likely to fall out before the real, tough stuff starts growing back, but it should begin to return for real about a month after my last chemo. Which brings us nicely to Christmas Day. A bit of stubble on my head - the best present Santa could bring!

 

Follow Laura Price on Twitter: www.twitter.com/bigscaryCword

FOLLOW HEALTH AND FITNESS
Dear Santa, I never imagined I would spend most of the year fighting breast cancer. Please bring me a full head of hair in 2013 and a cancer-free future for me and all those I love! Best wishes, La...
Dear Santa, I never imagined I would spend most of the year fighting breast cancer. Please bring me a full head of hair in 2013 and a cancer-free future for me and all those I love! Best wishes, La...
 
 
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Nancy Stordahl
11:21 PM on 12/20/2012
I completely understand about wanting a full head of hair for Christmas. Losing your hair is such a big deal. I always hated it when people said things to me like it's only hair or it'll grow back. It is just hair, but then again it isn't. And guess what? Mine hasn't grown back at all like it was. Thanks for your candor. It's much appreciated.
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:32 PM on 12/21/2012
Thanks for your comments, Nancy! Yeah, hair is such a big part of who we are - not just head hair but eyebrows and lashes as well - I look totally different and much more ill since they went away so I'm looking forward to six months from now when hopefully they'll have grown back a bit! I don't know how long ago you had chemo (will check your blogs in a minute!) but I'm certainly expecting mine to grow back curly or a different colour at first... Anyway, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a very happy, healthy new year. Take care, Laura
10:46 PM on 12/19/2012
Once again I am blown away by how open and courageous you are. As I have said before you have become a hero(ine) of mine. Whenever my own minor struggles start to get me down I think of you. I am sure that like me many people find you an inspiration. Thank you for sharing. I wish you a merry Christmas and a happy, hairy new year!
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
11:00 AM on 12/20/2012
Thanks so much! I'm really no heroine, I'm just doing what the doctors tell me to do and writing about it, which is the only way I know how, really! I'm glad I'm managing to inspire you though! Wishing you a wonderful Christmas and new year too and I'll keep you posted on my hair-growth progress!! Laura :)
05:20 PM on 01/04/2013
You are a very strong and a very brave woman, and I wish there were more like you instead of when other people whine on about things that really don't matter...

Happy New Year to to Laura...I wish you many years of health and happiness

All the best to you :-)
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elizabethjl
05:14 PM on 12/19/2012
Just loved reading your blog Laura, keep up the good spirits, all the very best for xmas and 2013+. :))
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:08 PM on 12/19/2012
Thank you Elizabeth! Glad you enjoyed it. Merry Christmas and a wonderful 2013 to you too! Laura :)
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elizabethjl
07:34 PM on 12/19/2012
It made me laugh about you walking into Christies with your rabbit onesie, reminded me of when I went to see my mum, I couldnt find her in the ward as everyone looked the same with their headscarves on, she had to shout me, we went passed her 3 times. LOL, sadly she never got better and passed away Christmas Eve, its such a horrible and cruel disease, but I wish you all the very very best for your future. :)
06:15 PM on 12/18/2012
Go on, Laura, and best of luck for 2013.

Happy Christmas, and keep writing. I'd read your stuff if you wrote about paint drying.
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:08 PM on 12/19/2012
hahaha I might do a post on paint drying to take you at your word! Hope you're well and a very merry Christmas to you too! Laura
04:47 PM on 12/18/2012
Our paths cross again ! I was the one who had a brain tumor and (probably the last) child to be treated with radio therapy Have a great Christmas Laura ,and keep running . all the best. Russell
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:07 PM on 12/19/2012
Hi Russell, glad you're still reading and following the blog then! I'm not back to running just yet as I'm due to start radiotherapy in 2 weeks but all in good time! A wonderful, healthy Christmas to you too and take care, Laura
03:38 PM on 12/18/2012
You look fab with or without. Rarely do I meet anyone nowadays who hasn't got first hand experience of cancer. Themselves or a loved one. So you hang in there.

Hair's a drag anyway.
I don't need a hersuiter suiter.
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:07 PM on 12/19/2012
Thank you! Yep it's true, we all know someone touched by cancer. I think the depressing statistic is 1 in 3. At least I feel I've faced it now and am ready to fight back! Best wishes to you, Laura
02:58 PM on 12/18/2012
like reading an extract from when my girlfriend had cancer...............you hang in there girl, enjoy xmas and look forward to a healthy life
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:06 PM on 12/19/2012
Oh, I hope your girlfriend is healthy and well now. I'm doing well too, thanks again and Merry Xmas to you too! Laura
02:21 PM on 12/18/2012
Inspiring and touching article Laura. Have a lovely Christmas and celebrate in style!
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:05 PM on 12/19/2012
Thanks, glad you enjoyed it, and I hope you have a wonderful Christmas too!
11:45 PM on 12/17/2012
Your strength is inspiring, thank you so much for sharing such a difficult time in your young life.
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
07:05 PM on 12/19/2012
Thank you, it's a pleasure to share my story and hopefully raise awareness or at least help others going through the same thing!
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07:50 PM on 12/17/2012
Good luck with the future .check out research into alkaline diet and low dose asprin for cancer survivors

HAPPY CHRISTMAS ..............XXXXXXX
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
09:06 PM on 12/17/2012
Thank you! Happy Christmas to you too! Laura xx
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Mette Poynton
06:49 PM on 12/17/2012
An amazing and wonderful piece... Merry Christmas x
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Laura Price
Yorkshire lass kicking cancer in the ass
09:05 PM on 12/17/2012
Thanks! Merry Christmas to you too! Laura xx