THE BLOG

Three Reasons Online Dating Isn't Working For You (And How To Fix It)

12/06/2013 18:02 BST | Updated 12/08/2013 10:12 BST

When people find out I work for an international online dating site, one of the most common things I hear is, "online dating doesn't work!" Then they go into some story about how either they or someone they know used to have a profile online but never met anyone they liked. While online dating certainly comes with no guarantees (if only!) if you're willing to put in the time and effort, and in some cases, money, you'd be amazed what you'll get back. If you find yourself striking out when it comes to finding love online, don't give up! Here are three reasons why online dating isn't working for you and what to do differently.

You are never online

Are you guilty of signing up for an online dating site and creating a profile, only to log-in once a month and wonder why you haven't met the person of your dreams? A huge, crucial aspect of online dating is actually being online. When a potential match views your profile and reads that you haven't logged in for two weeks (most online dating sites note your last log-in for other members to see), it's quite likely they will pass you by, because who knows when you'll read their message, if ever. Plus, being online means that you can utilize everything the site has to offer, whether it's chatting for free with a match or taking quizzes to better boost your compatibility.

Quick fix: Schedule a standing appointment with your online dating site. Make it a priority. For example, reserve tuesday and thursday evenings for logging in and catching up on anything or anyone you may have missed.

You are too picky

Nowhere does it say that to have a successful online dating experience you need to accept every date offer you get or return every message. I am certainly not here to tell you to lower your standards and go out with people who you know won't ultimately make you happy. However, having standards and trusting your intuition is one thing; finding something wrong with every single person who crosses your path online is another.

Quick fix: Write up a list of the 10 most important qualities someone must have before you'll go out with them, and look for profiles that match your criteria. If a potential match has any of the qualities on your list, give him or her a chance! It's just a date, not marriage.

Profile problems

Never, ever underestimate how important your online dating profile is. It's the only way potential online dating matches are able to tell if they want to get to know you or not. It's your calling card, and unfortunately, online dating profile mess-ups can really impact your dating life, and not for the better!

Here are two of the most common online dating profile faux-pas and how to fix them.

1) Not filling out your profile in it's entirety. Leaving a lot of spaces blank or only writing a sentence or two says that you don't care that much about online dating or aren't open to the process. The fix? Fill it out! Tell the world about yourself and what you're looking for. Be specific and allow your personality to shine through.

2) Over-sharing. Yes, I just told you to be specific and express your personality in your profile, but some people take it a little too far. Over-sharing is a huge turn-off simply because it makes you look like a drama queen (or king!) The world doesn't need to know your life story, nor does anyone want to read about the issues and trials you've been through in your life. Keep it positive!