OCD is something I never seem to talk about often due to my lack of confidence on talking about the subject. I'm usually never brave enough to talk about something that's very private in my life or share it with others. I'm the sort of person who likes to keep things securely stored inside my head because I feel it's much less bother.
I feel it's time to come out of my comfort zone and talk about something that may raise awareness and encourage others to discuss their problems.
I tend to "obsess" over things, such as various objects, interests and people.
My main "obsession" problem is with people. I get these fixations on people that I can't shake for months, sometimes a year or perhaps longer. I never want to be fixated on them, and it tears me up because I can't make it stop.
Something about a certain person will interest me.I don't necessarily have a "crush" on that person; I just happen to find them interesting in some way. (The thing that is intriguing about them often is very small, at first.) This eventually progresses into an obsession, and I can't get them out of my mind. Everything reminds me of them and I don't know what to do to make it stop.
It's usually with a person I don't know or somebody I've only just met recently. It takes over your everyday life until eventually it becomes known to that person once I've shamefully told them and shared my feelings towards them.
Going back to the time of when I was sectioned in a psychiatric unit miles away from home as my obsessions grew worse and became vividly worrying that it weighed down my life and I felt considerably low, I built up a great bond with a male member of staff who I became dependent on to spend time with.
I could never get his name out of my head. I started pestering him and talking to him a lot. Then It became a little more worrying. Because I seen him as someone to look up to, I then thought about what If he could adopt me. That idea never left my head! I know it sounds strange but I couldn't help this as it was a part of my OCD. It got a little over the top to the point I was embarrassed to be around him and got very shy.
That was one of my brief experiences and the extend of seriousness my obsession became. As unusual as it may seem, this is a trait of OCD which I think is not highlighted enough as I'm sure many people out there can relate to this in some way or another.
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