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Whether you're Insta-famous, a bona fide celebrity, a CEO of a listed company, or in any position in the public eye, you know what it's like to have trolls come for you.
Sometimes it's hard to understand why they're attacking you, and it's bad enough when the keyboard warriors come for you in their scores... but what if a fandom comes for you? What if it's a celebrity you respect? What if someone says something that could really affect your brand? What if they try to destroy you, your business, your puppy, and the horse you rode in on?
What do you do in those few moments when your amygdala (the part of your brain that controls emotions) kicks into fight mode and you want to vigorously defend yourself or cry?
Some people thrive on the attention, whether good or bad. If you're NOT one of those here's some tips to survive the 15-mins fame-whoring of your troll(s).
[NOTE: this article on Huff Po is the shortened version of an article of the same name - click here to read the full article on my website for celebrities and those in the public eye].
BOSS MOVE #1: WITHHOLD THE FUEL Trolls are like cars... they need fuel to function. Most trolls (influential or not) are looking for a reaction. Ignore them. It usually fizzles out within 1-3 days at the most when there is no fuel added.
BOSS MOVE #2: COLLECT YOUR EVIDENCE If their attack lasts over 48-hours it may be a good idea to discover as much about them as you can. Screenshot everything. It may become useful later. Your lawyer may need it too if they verge into the arena of slander or libel.
BOSS MOVE #3: WHIP YOUR HAIR & SHAKE 'EM OFF! It's hard to say "they're just jealous" without feeling a little too into yourself. But sometimes it's that simple! You could rub someone up the wrong way by just being fabulous and having a lot of amazing fans!
BOSS MOVE #4: GET THEM SUSPENDED... If their behavior constitutes bullying or harassment on a major social network you and a ton of your fans should report them to get the network to suspend the troll altogether.
BOSS MOVE #5: RAISE THE STAKES Get your wallet out when you wanna clap back... get out all the cash out you have in the house. Get your jewellry, car keys, everything... Put it in ONE BIG PILE. Now look at it and ask yourself... "Would I pay all this to buy the right to tell this idiot what I really think?". If the answers YES... Donate the pile to charity that day!
BOSS MOVE #6: ACTIVATE YOUR FANDOM The best defense to a troll is to let your fans stick up for you, then thank your fans for being loyal. ALWAYS be spinning the situation to benefit you and your fans! If you have a fandom (even if it's small) help them catch wind of it in a DM. Leave the rest to them.
BOSS MOVE #7: DON'T PLAY YOURSELF! If you could lose your contracts, house, endorsements and future all for acting a fool, then why choose to play yourself? Be true to you, but don't let your reactions or your mouth get you into a position where you could lose opportunities.
BOSS MOVE #8: TIME YOUR CLAPBACK Occasionally the clapback is necessary. Instead of answering what they said, look for a flaw in how they said it, or the fact that they are even on the planet at all. You're not arguing with a fool, you're insulting the fool for being a fool.
BOSS MOVE #9: CHANNEL THE EXPERIENCE INTO YOUR WORK Being trolled doesn't mean you have to be a victim! Channel how you feel into your music /your show/ a movement whatever... and celebrate courage and badassery! Every experience is a stepping stone.
BOSS MOVE #10: REVERSE YOUR EMOTIONAL RESPONSE #Challenge... get to a stage where you are no longer triggered by the haters at all. Learn to control your Amygdala. Check out 10 Steps from Mark Goulston M.D. here.
BOSS MOVE #11: KEEP TROLLS IN THEIR PLACE Never elevate their negativity to the level of those who ACTUALLY matter in your life! Even if they're famous! Your real family & friends know the good & bad about you and they STILL love you.
BOSS MOVE #12: HAVE SMART OUTLETS If it's hard to speak openly to a confidant, try signing up for an anxiety/stress app like Pacifica to help you take control of your feelings about your crazy life. It'll help you to learn how to manage stress and anxiety better and not become too overwhelmed.
BOSS MOVE #13: HAND 'EM THE ROPE! Another benefit you have to NOT clapping back immediately is your troll may end up just hanging themselves without you lifting a finger. #Bonus: everything they write/say gives you free publicity spin it for your benefit!
BOSS MOVE #14: USE YOUR ALTER EGO A lot of celebrities have an alter ego. Realize that these people are commenting on YOUR PUBLIC PERSONA... not you! They don't know you.
In summary, the moral of #BOSSMOVES is this...
Trolls are a right of passage. You're doing something right. They're part of your coming of age in the public eye. The best answer to any hater is to be better than them, and make 'em eat your dust!
Now it's over to you!
Have you used any of these #BossMoves yourself?
Tweet me @MarshaWright on the hashtag #BossMoves and share your #BossMoves for handling haters, trolls and instigators.
Sound off in the comments below too! How do YOU deal with trolls?
Remember to share the article and check out the FULL version of this article on my site... tons of tips that you need and can use.