As we creep out of our new years' blues into February, the majority of women in long-term relationships will probably hope for just a little sincerity; a bit of consideration when the 14th strikes. A card, a meal, maybe a bunch of flowers to show that he still cares - that's, if the idea of full-blown romance is out of the question, of course! Ladies in newer relationships on the other hand may have loftier desires; such as being swept of their feet in a passionate display of idealistic creativity; he has to prove his worthiness after all. But which type of man is likely to provide this?
As the uncertainty as to what they will, or won't, receive on St Valentine's Day increases, women up and down the nation ponder numerous possibilities. Ironically, women should apply the same premise of numerous possibilities, to the men in their life too.
Although it is often spouted that all men are the same - a statement often heard in many office workplaces or bar discussions - this doesn't appear to be the case. I discovered in my recent research that there actually appears to be twenty-seven different types of men you could meet. Not one or two, but twenty-seven, who all think and behave uniquely; which, begs a couple of important questions...
Women: What type of man are you with? Men: What type of man are you really?
'How can this be the case?' Men are such simple creatures, as they constantly like to remind everyone; and some of their behaviour corroborates. However, although men are clearly habitual, they aren't all necessarily simple; and definitely not the same. There are 'common'; 'rarer'; 'appealing'; 'do not notice' and of course...'get rid' types. And your valentine will be in one of these groups.
Again questions beg to be answered. Women: What type of man do you attract? Men: Which group do you fall into? And how's this going to affect your Valentine's day?
At the slightest mention of the month 'February' some men bury their heads in the sand like an ostrich; others can't wait to discuss their elaborate plans with confident assertiveness. Then, of course, there are those men who blatantly disregard the pink and black colour scheme in every single shop. There are so many different types of men. Not one woman walking the face of the earth can say she hasn't been mistaken at least once.
Everyone has had a dating disaster that went wrong quicker than calling out an ex-partner's name; so how do you know if it is a 'Rationaliser', 'Mr Secure' or an 'Opportunist' you're dealing with? It's probable that an 'Appreciator' is more likely to be romantic than a 'Disdainer'. So if you dream of idyllic settings with depth of meaning in his wordplay, you need to be alert to his patterns. Not his smile, wallet or popularity but his decisions, drives and desire for gratification.
Well here's the first tip; all men are a dynamic interaction of their brain type (B), environmental influences (E) and thought processing strategy (T). This creates his unique code. Some men are more drawn to systemising and logic in their decision-making whilst others however, are more empathetic and intuitive. So be aware, your Valentine's day could be riding on it. Come on, you must have known there was some other reason, (besides him being completely insensitive!), as to why your best friend received a deluge of indulgent gifts - leading to a marriage proposal on Valentine's day, whilst you got some belated corner store flowers and a poor excuse for a card. What kind of 'BET' did you make?
For women in a brand new courtship, you need to understand the 'BET' you make before committing to the relationship. This man is trying to impress, deceive or assess you. So there is NO way on god's green earth you're seeing his true habitual patterns of behaviour straight away; his safety nets that get him through the day and identify his type. Women in longer relationships you've made your choice; some of you love your decision; others have doubt nestled in the corner of their mind. But, perhaps this man doesn't resemble the one he told you he was.
You have to spot his habitual patterns of behaviour, dismantle his excuses and telegraphed responses. I'm not telling you to turn into a paranoid investigator. However, understanding your BET gives you greater insight and self-awareness. It's incredibly easy to sleep next to a 'Chameleon', mistaking him for a 'Family Man'.
However its not all negative, there are some 'good' BET's out there; and with this comes continual maintenance. Don't expect your relationship to stay great because last year it was. We all need to be proactive. So maybe next Valentine's day, you'll be able to keep the guessing to an absolute minimum when wondering what your man might do.