Last week I wrote a blog entitled: "Have the Balls bashers gone mad?"
This week I have to ask the question: is it really the Tory right that's gone mad? Taken collective leave of its senses? The non-stop chatter about whether or not Cameron will survive until 2015 and the endless speculation about whether it'll be Theresa May or Boris Johnson who succeeds him is bizarre - and the leadership-bid-that-never-was from unknown Tory backbencher Adam Afriyie was simply beyond parody. In fact, I find myself, weirdly, unusually and unexpectedly, coming to the defence of our poor prime minister.
Memo to Tory plotters and rebels: it ain't all Dave's fault. Nor will forcing the PM to fall on his sword to spend more time with his DVD collection save your party from defeat in the Euro elections in 2014 or the general election in 2015.
Don't get me wrong. I have long argued that David Cameron is a deeply overrated politician, and out of his depth on the economy in particular. His failure to win a majority in 2010, despite being up against a tired and hapless Gordon Brown is evidence of how unpopular the Tory leader is; the long list of U-turns he has since had to perform in office reveals a lack of basic competence and attention to detail.
But to pretend that the Tories would have done any better in 2010 under a more right-wing, less socially liberal candidate is pure bunk, belied by every study that's been conducted on the results of the last general election. And to believe that Liam 'freeze all spending despite the failure of auserity' Fox or Philip 'freeze all spending except in my own department' Hammond would win the party more votes than Cameron come 2015 is nothing short of delusional.
But what about Theresa May, I hear you ask? Yes, in the words of John Rentoul, "the attraction of a comprehensive-educated, Thatcher-like alternative who is tough on crime is obvious". Might she also help the Tories win back women voters? Maybe.*
Yet, as the Sunday Times/YouGov poll yesterday revealed, only 12% of voters think she would do a better job than Cameron, compared to 35% who say she'd be worse. Some of us haven't forgotten Catgate either.
It cannot be said often enough: the prime minister continues to outpoll both his party and the coalition. Yes, he and his allies are too "posh, male and white"; yes, the prime minister has been unable (unwilling?) to silence his backbench critics through the usual combination of charm, patronage and... intimidation.
The Tories' problems, however, are more structural than personal; more about policy than personnel. Thus regime change is, in a sense, irrelevant.
Perhaps the wilfully-blind Tory rebels should consider the following six questions.
1) How would replacing Dave with, say, Boris change the fact that the voting system is so skewed against the Tories that the party needs a double-digit lead over Labour in order to secure a single-seat majority in the Commons - especially after Conservative backbench rebels (and not Cameron) provoked the Lib Dems into opposing boundary changes?
2) How would replacing Cameron with Adam Afriyie change the fact that the Tories need to up their share of the vote at the next general election in order to win a majority - an achievement that was beyond even the ability of their heroine Margaret Thatcher at the height of her powers (in 1983 and 1987)?
3) How would replacing Cameron with Theresa May win over the three key groups of voters that Cameron failed to seduce in 2010 - public-sector workers, Scots and ethnic minorities?
4) How would replacing Cameron with Philip Hammond help the Conservative Party detoxify its brand in a country where 42% of voters say they would "never" vote Tory (compared to 30% for Labour)?
5) How would replacing Cameron with Michael Gove prevent a looming triple-dip recession, or give economic growth a much-needed boost? How would it cancel out the four-fifths of public spending cuts that are still to come?
6) How would replacing Cameron would Liam Fox stop the flow of Lib Dem voters to Labour? "Ed Miliband is finding it very hard to persuade voters to switch from Mr Cameron's party to his," wrote ConHome's Paul Goodman in December. "But he doesn't need to do so in order to nudge Labour's poll share, come 2015, into the mid-30s or higher: all he must do is to hold on to those Lib Dem defectors."
Do the rebels on the right have adequate answers to any of these six questions? Do they even recognise the existence of such awkward queries? Or do I a smell a bit of denialism on their part?
Look, I get why unhappy - and more 'traditional' - Tories look at the polls, look at the Eastleigh result, and focus their ire on Cameron and his 'modernizing', gay-marrying, Notting Hill ways. Change the leader, they wail, and we'll be able to give Labour (and Ukip) a good kicking. It's a seductive if simplistic proposition. But, for once, personality politics is irrelevant. The Conservative Party's problems are much wider and deeper - psephological, historical, geographical and, perhaps above all else, related to the state of the economy.
And what I don't get is how putting Boris, Theresa, Adam, Michael, Liam or Philip in charge, in Dave's place, will help solve such seemingly insoluble problems.
* For those on the right who automatically and patronisingly assume that putting a woman on the ticket wins over female voters, I have just two words: Sarah Palin.
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That may leave some of the party faithful in a snit but won't move them to the left or center where they can expect worse.
Most of the talk of a replacement sounds like the usual media tripe, generating controversy to draw attention.
The key question would be how a replacement would make different choices in the present difficult circumstances. There is room for improvement with those choices, but is another Conservative going to end this austerity nonsense, for example.
Then look at the left wing circulation the mirror, the independant and the guardian. Total circulation: 1.4 million
Then look at the opinion polls on benefits, austerity (extreme stupidity) and various others.
It is an irrational but seemingly indestructive belief that shooting off the top will address the ills. Of course it does not, but it makes people feel better for a little while, and in these grey times even that may matter. But I am glad that this article exists because it draws people's attention to the fact that problems and issues need to be addressed, the person at the top is secondary. Thx for small mercies.
It has been interesting to see how rebellious and seemingly unmotivated by electoral success and power the Tory backbenchers are, compared with the more docile, sheep-like Labour ones were during 1997-2010.
Labour are looking like the natural party of government, as they seem able to hold together a coalition of groups with seemingly conflicting values and ideals. I don't think they will be able to manage the deficit better and that may split Labour, but if the economy picks up, they may do ok.
It prevents communities investing their funds in local businesses that employ and serve them. Gifting banking monopoly, and their support for supporters.
“Taken collective leave of its senses?”
Having had a canvassing candidate stunned into silence and scamper away, when posed a few simple questions. Methinks ‘tis too late.
“endless speculation about whether it'll be Theresa May or Boris Johnson who succeeds him is bizarre”
yet nevertheless explicable. Given that referendums (for majority mandates in decision making processes) are frowned upon.
“the long list of U-turns”
is a paradox. Since policy in a democracy is determined by the people…isn’t it?
“tough on crime”
But even tougher on the reporting of crime? Not to mention victims of crime being advised to ‘go away and forget it’.
“It cannot be said often enough”
It ain’t democracy. It’s a word for mass delusion.
“regime change is, in a sense, irrelevant”
Since a party system is a party system is a party system is, divide and misrule.
“consider the following six questions”
1. Should a primary requirement for politicians be a firm grasp of reality?
2. Do politicians believe in democracy?
3. What is democracy?
4. Why does their answer differ from GOTP, BTP, FTP?
5. Who would claim anything other than majority mandating of policies is democracy?
6. Are they sure that isn’t evidence for the absence of a firm grasp of reality?
There's one area where she gets a lot of informed input and selects well - her wardrobe.
She was the subject of a radio documentary a few months ago and it stated that her youthful ambition had been to be UK's first woman PM so wasn't a huge fan of Thatcher.
She was described as someone that worked alone, even ate alone except in late evenings when her husband joined her in one or other HoC dining room.
Would she give in to the sort of 'personal cult' building that Clegg did during early '10 when he was glammed up via features about his home and his trophy wife?
Ugh, could we bear hearing about Chez May?
One has to admire Cameron's ability to see that this altruism was a pretence (rather like a white wedding dress!)
Clegg was bought so easily, all it took was getting him tired over a long weekend after weeks of everyone's campaigning, keep him away from others' influence, yadder yadder yadder, flirt and wink ;-) , offers of UNearned ministerial roles and bob's yer uncle, Clegg was bedded after 3 days.
The pinnacle of that conquest was the sickening 'Come backkkkkkkk' joshing in the garden.
My stomach has been heaving for nearly three years.