There have been a series of disappearances since Christmas in our area. Mothers and fathers plucked from the bosom of their families unexpectedly. Distraught children. And all of this, the work of a serial thriller.
The perpetrator has been box sets of series 1 of The Killing given as Christmas presents to fathers and mothers relieved that actually they are receiving something for Christmas that they actually want.
Children have been temporarily orphaned as a result both from their parents but also from the main television set in the lounge of all houses, the loss of the latter being felt greater than the loss of the former.
My wife and I pressed "play" on New Year's Eve and remained rooted to the spot for five hours, only stopping when exhaustion took over. This was unlike the dogged hero of The Killing, Sarah Lund, focussed, objective driven who I am sure would watch every box set of "24" including the deleted scenes and interviews with the cast in one sitting after receiving them.
Single episodes could not be watched in one day. Always two, or three, the "stop" button only pressed when the children protested that they needed to be fed or the kitchen was on fire.
As we passed episode 10, my wife declared mournfully that the experience was killing her. But still, we continued becoming acclimatised to all things Danish, getting to like the chunky scratchy Faeroe island jumpers that Sarah Lund wore with the patterns reminiscent of the sensible garments which my mother used to buy me in the 1970s. Of the language, we have learnt one word after 1,100 minutes of criminal investigation misery - "Tak" (Thank you) which has now enter household parlance.
Our cocker spaniel too enjoyed all 20 episodes knowing that for extended periods, he would be able to sleep on our knees without being told to get off the sofa, and only stirring briefly in episode nineteen when the puppy had its walk on part. As time went by, it became clear that he developed an uncanny resemblance to the Police Chief in those moments where he was berating Sarah Lund for completely ignoring police protocol - his head sombre and still, eyes mournful until he started licking his private parts, the dog that is, not the Police Chief.
I long for series two which I have told my children is about the murderous behaviour of a Copenhagen dentist over a week in August and series three which is about a notorious Copenhagen snack bar selling poisonous fruit tarts. Otherwise known as "The Drilling" and "The Filling".