Boris Johnson prefaces his 800-word hagiography on Qatar - 'We can't afford to ignore our dynamic friends in the East' - with an anecdote about camel ...
When I first touched down in Heathrow on 2 June 2012 I was broke, had one tattoo and was engaged. Now, I'm still broke, but I have collected 21 more tattoos (soon to be 22 - sorry Mum), and I'm definitely not engaged anymore.
When it comes to the UAE, British values whither when the temptation of untold riches is on offer. Certain politicians have grabbed all they can, be it for personal gain or departmental funds, and ignored abuses against British and Emirati citizens alike.
New research by national sight loss charity RNIB has revealed that 17,000 vision impaired people of working age look set to be displaced from their homes as a result of the Bedroom Tax. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, they will have to choose between relocating or losing a portion of their benefits (which will be on average £14 a week; a sizeable sum when you are already struggling to make ends meet).
As a cyclist myself, I congratulate Boris on scaling up his transport ambitions and recognising the benefits of making London a cycle friendly city; if just some of his plans go through, they will be a great victory for cycling in London. The plans however face many obstacles...
Let me make it clear: I am not a Boris Johnson fan. For me, he is a sideshow act; although I do believe he is serious about having power. Having watched Eddie Mair eviscerate him on the Marr show the day before, I was curious to see him up close and personal.
However many classical or sporting analogies he cites, whatever his chances of being reincarnated as an olive really are, we all know that Boris would kill to be prime minister. But then, the same is true of almost every single minister and the vast majority of MPs.
In the wake of Boris Johnson's train wreck interview on the Andrew Marr Show, much has been said about both Boris' future and the rights and wrongs of Eddie Mair's questioning style. But I think the major issue thrown up by the interview has yet to be discussed: whether or not Boris Johnson has what it takes to be the leader of a major party and what the interview on Sunday said about those ambitions.
Superheroes? Maybe not. Superficially alluring to a small subsection of disenchanted Tory voters? Certainly. Able to push a jittery Tory party to the right, despite having few policies and no MPs? Quite possibly.
All of those who think that Eddie Mair M was grandstanding on the Andrew Marr Show on Sunday have never heard the man and his work over a decade daily on BBC Radio 4. If you actually do listen to him, you'll already know that his questioning of Boris Johnson was vintage Mair and the way that this fine journalist/broadcaster treats EVERYBODY.
The Mayor of London is a brand, one of the reasons that he is simply "Boris". One name and pop! we get the entire picture. And the picture is indeed writ large. Like something out of an international Dickens fantasy...
Has the Tory right gone mad? Taken collective leave of its senses? The non-stop chatter about whether or not David Cameron will survive until 2015 and the endless speculation about whether it'll be Theresa May or Boris Johnson who succeeds him is bizarre. In fact, I find myself, weirdly, unusually and unexpectedly, coming to the defence of our poor prime minister.
I didn't do an apprenticeship, but I did a close second, which was a trainee scheme offered by my first employer. Six months of constant mentoring and moving around different roles, learning how things ticked and why my efforts made a difference to both me, my colleagues and the company.
Levels of cycling in Britain are amongst the lowest across Europe - only 2% of us use a bike as our main method of getting around. In the Netherlands, 20 times more journeys are made by bike by people under 17 than in the UK. And the main reason for this is the perceived lack of safety.
Whilst the Mayor may not be in the business of running healthcare services, he does have a responsibility to combat health inequalities. There couldn't be a bigger health inequality than some communities having access to great quality services, whilst others are forced to suffer the burden of travelling tens of miles to access services that they should be able to get locally.
Coming days after RBS announced a £607m bonus pool to "reward" staff for losses of £5bn, Boris' defence of the banking industry is in itself deluded - and as far as the UK economy is concerned, self-defeating.