As a parting aside, I definitely reckon I know who Michael "Tarzan" Heseltine will be backing to be the new leader of the Tories. It's got to be Theresa May, hasn't it? If for no other reason than those infamous African inspired Leopard print kitten heels of hers.
Stop flailing. Stop feeling impotent. Stop shouting into the echo chamber. I'm talking to myself of course, but I'm sure I've not been alone - hopelessly casting about, waiting someone to tell me exactly what I can do to make this better.
Michael doesn't let obstacles get in the way of his drive for improving the life chances and opportunities of those who are failed by government. He is demanding but, in my experience, incredibly loyal and supportive of his colleagues. He set a clear direction but gave me the freedom and autonomy to develop the agenda and shape legislation.
Explain why, Home Secretary, that when you make your constant references to police transgressions, you don't balance this by referring to the fact that the number of officers involved are but an infinitesimal speck when set against the tens of thousands of officers who have served or are serving since the 1980s?
The real immigration problem is not migration from the EU but from outside the EU, over which the UK has had complete control all along, but which has soared out of control nevertheless. How did this come about? And how can the problem be solved?
Back in the 1960s life moved at a more sedate pace. Arguing that political fortunes could change very quickly Labour Prime Minister Harold Wilson pointed out that a week is a long time in politics. Well, move over granddad: these days we move far faster. Events move on in days, hours and sometimes minutes. We have entered an era when politics is at warp speed.
On 23rd June over 17 million people voted in favour of the UK leaving the European Union. On that same day, over 16 million people voted to remain. That is over 33 million people that organised a proxy, walked to a post box with a postal vote or made their way to a polling station, to cast their vote and have their say.
The British EU Referendum Remain campaign team are in the process of digesting their strategy to work out why having Tony Blair and Gordon Brown on their side didn't appear to work.
Boris took the right and brave decision of announcing that he will not stand. This is a disappointment to those who backed him, but a testament to a man of character, honour and dignity - and a stark contrast to the awful sight of a Labour leader clinging on to his position even if it will tear his party apart. I have been convinced today by Theresa May that she is the one to deliver.
The British vote to leave the EU has ended decades of ambiguity in our relationship with Europe. Although, in the immediate aftermath of the result, it is easy to see only challenges and uncertainty ahead, the decision will in fact bring many opportunities and much clarity for both the UK and EU partners.
So as the end-of-term rain hammers down outside, as the postman thinks up new and more outrageous insults as the Summer holidays go on, as the political leaders rip one another apart and as people try to figure out whether Article 50 will actually work in reality... weeks without bells and a timetable loom. Now what?
Should I think about leaving ? For me the answer is no. I won't leave because this is my home and I am confident this rise in hatred can be tackled, so to all those who say 'leave if you don't like it' I'm here to stay.
For as long as we are in the EU, your MEPs will continue to represent you in Brussels and to help our constituents. As your elected politicians we now also have the task of helping our ministers and diplomats achieve a smooth withdrawal from the EU on the best possible terms for our country.
Despite all the sadness and horror, I'm going to remain a member. I'm taking a leaf out of Corbyn's book and I'm going to fight from within to save the Labour Party. We only have one chance left to get our Party back and I urge as many of you left-wing moderates out there as possible to join me, become members of the Labour Party, and do the same.
The stage has been set for Boris to full on Clegg Gove, or allow Gove to Clegg himself. Gove has probably already been clegged and he's too powergasmed to know any better. While poor Govey takes the bullet for whatever shitstorm follows the U.K leaving the EU, Boris can disassociate himself from the whole Brextastrophee, only to return when we've all forgotten who was driving the car.
We are living through one of the greatest sea changes in British history and if the past week has been anything to go by we cannot rely on our elected officials alone to decide on what our country's future is going to be like. We have to come together, work together and decide together what our future is going to look like. We have to build it for ourselves.