What do you say to someone who is suffering through infertility? We'll we can certainly share with you what not to say. Over the years we have pretty much heard it all. Being on the receiving end makes you feel very exposed, sad, somehow less human. It was like we just admitted that we lost the primal ability to procreate, or procreate easily anyway.
During our last final bite at the IVF apple we let the world into our bedroom. OK, get your mind out of the gutter. We allowed MTV to film us for a year to document our infertility journey on the Emmy award winning series "True Life". Our show was "I'm Desperate to have a Baby". Not the most flattering of titles but also not entirely inaccurate either. We ARE desperate to have a baby.
My instinct tells me that if I want a baby it will come naturally or if it doesn't maybe it is not meant to be. Others have a different vibe about the whole thing and are comfortable with fertility treatment, IVF or other procedures. But for me and for many of my friends the cost was getting too high. It made me sick, frustrated, anxious and most of all I lost me.
I had always expected I would have kids. As a child you dress dollies and give them names. Mine were two girls, just like my sister and I. Charlotte and Helena. Then you start dating boyfriends and imagine what your children would look like. Then life happens. Career, divorce, loss of a parent, sadness.