Many of us get stuck in a rut after a break-up and find it hard to move forward. It can be hard to get over someone when they are constantly in your thoughts. Confidence and self-esteem always take a hit when it's not your choice to end the relationship and hiding away can be a good way of avoiding having to face up to this.
A Judge has recently ruled in the case of Tracey Wright that she should go out and get herself a job rather than rely on her ex-husband to provide maintenance for her to live on. This has caused huge ripples as there is now expected to be a huge rush to the courts to renegotiate divorce settlements.
Telling the children is the part that many parents fear the most. The last thing that they want to do is hurt their children and it's a really difficult conversation to have as the consequences are life changing for the whole family. However there are some guidelines that will make it a little easier if you follow them.
Christmas is traditionally a time for families to be together. This can heighten emotions, especially loneliness if you are single as the focus is on happy families at this time of year. It can really highlight the fact that you don't have that special someone to share it with and that can be hard to deal with.
If you are in the middle of divorce, you can get pretty low. Let's face it, the whole divorce process is exhausting, there is so much new info to take on board, with advice from your lawyer, financial advisor, friends and colleagues. Plus you are carving a new pathway for yourself and your family and learning to live a new life.
The worst thing is the backsliding. It happens, and you just have to accept it. This is apparently one of the things that hits a lot of people the hardest: you're chugging along doing fine, and then it kicks you in the guts, as visceral as it is emotional. It's a cruel intrusion into your belief that you were doing well, and stirs up all kind of worries...
You're divorcing your spouse, not divorcing your kids. Separation is hard to swallow for children that have a loving relationship with both parents, and usually, a divorce leaves emotional damage behind. You may be eager to move on, but for your children, it's important that divorce is handled delicately and with them in mind - stability is crucial.