How often do you ask for feedback from your network? Honest, genuine, no holds barred feedback?

I'm frequently asked about the best ways to keep in touch with your network, particularly when our schedules are so tightly packed. There are a number of approaches that make up an effective relationship-building strategy, including one to one meetings and proactive use of social media.

If someone offers you a referral in 2013, make sure you follow up. If it's not an introduction you want, communicate that clearly but politely. Even offer to pass it onto someone more appropriate. If it is, make both yourself and your champion look good by responding in good time.

Of course, a campaign based on relationship-building and winning hearts and minds has got to be authentic and come from a genuine interest in the other party, rather than a box-ticking exercise. But when such an approach is authentic, the rewards can be tangible.

It's not enough just to give and to expect to get something back in return. You have to first know what you want and then clearly communicate it to the people in your network if you want to enjoy the dividends from your networking.

Over local delicacies in Hong Kong last night a friend of mine shared two stories that, while seemingly unrelated, combine to illustrate an important lesson in how we relate to other people.