We are all guilty of it. All shamefaced at the occasional aimless phone surfing, but when it gets to the point when you are looking at your phone whilst brushing your own teeth, you need to have a think about your life. Switch it off. Shift your brain from the outside world and bring it in to your world for a minute. And your family's.
You try making conversation, but none develops. Your hopes of meeting new people, making new friends, forming bonds with other parents for the sake of your child are dwindling. You end up sitting alone in a corner, watching your child play alone while all around a community you long to be a part of continues on oblivious.
If I was walking to the shop on my own to buy some milk, I would have also been on an automatic, robot-mode walking at an incredibly fast pace with one thought and one thought only: to purchase the milk and walk back in an equally fast pace, without a care for anything or anyone at all. Milk would have been the only care.
Most of my conversations now revolve around being a dad, occasionally unusual topics such as is it OK to have a sit down wee if you're tired pop into conversation, but ultimately everything ends up circling back to parenting as if every road leads there. 'I love the new Ferrari......' 'its amazing, I wonder if you can get a buggy in?'
f you are a parent who is wondering how you can develop or improve the relationship with your young child, don't feel like you have to face this task alone. Children's centres are there to help all parents and their children, and who need anything from a place to meet others, routine advice or more significant help.
The relationship went from being my friend to a full blown affair, late night sessions while Tash and the baby slept. Slipping of secretly to the toilet, sat on the throne, paper in one hand, Siri in the other using only the pins and needles as a reminder that i had been in there long enough - Tash hadn't even seen me poop.
This is probably one of the main topics that before the arrival you get the most opinions on and can feel the most pressure and judgement. But just do what is right for you, of course listen to the opinions, but do what makes you happy and you feel most comfortable with. I still believe there is no right or wrong way.
It's funny how a small stick with wee on can change your life so dramatically!... well that, and having sex without wearing 'waterproofs. Obviously I didn't wee on the stick, I was tempted though as I'd heard this myth that if you do, and it changes colour or something, it's to do with a faulty prostate.
There are so many perks to this fathering gig. I just cannot believe the benefits of having a small child with you, wherever you go. I'm pretty sure that I outrank old age pensioners, the disabled, war veterans, sick animals and even other children. The list is endless and I take full advantage of it at every opportunity.